windthread

the question being….what's the chances of a woman born for the Lizard clan partnering up on a serious level with Goats?

yesterday a really unbelievable thing occured.  there was a

tornado

in Socorro County.   Who could ever have imagined?

before i found Spirit Cloth,  i had spent some time following Sharon Astyk's blog  Casaubon's Book.  she is the author of Depletion and Abundance.  to me, she is to sustainability  what Jude is to  clothmaking.  Both are rare women.  both brilliant.  both know what they are committed to.  her blog now is Chatelaine's Keys.  i spent a little time reading through some of her Posts yesterday.  until the storm, when i had to shut down the computer. 

 

 

 

it has been Some Week.  and i hesitate to put it all here because this blog is about Cloth, or,  is supposed to be.  but …..           Cloth turns out to be Life?,  it seems……………….     and this is Life too.  Jude's Contemporary boro 2….SO much.  aside from the denim jumpers,  aside from the Experiment that i have not photographed,  there is this.  this is the futon cover from the other Boro class.  looking for the pic i was surprised to see it was dated 10-8-2010!  there are weak spots.  so….these i will mend in this Boro class:
here it is then

i tend to sit on this end and seams have pulled.  so i will mend them.

and the Diaries Cloth.  during this week, i have found myself coming to the stitching here over and over,  for just moments at a time.  one line of kantha, two.  three.  just the rhythm of it.  i am down into the Toad eggs, almost to where the "world as it really is" is.  almost finished with this side.

What will that feel like?

ok.  so then,  this is the part that i don't know.    "Weather" here has always been fairly predictable in my 20 years or so,  17 years here, in this Place.  now, Not.  this week has been very much like our monsoon season in July.  Storms,   electical magic shows,  rain,  but with the addition of very High Winds….which is new.  and i am living in the company of 14 sentient beings that i cannot bring

in

the dogs.  the cat.  i can call them In.   but the goats….no. 

so, since i have made a commitment to them, by penning them here…….i need to do the Best I Can to provide a place where they are sheltered.

and amidst all That,  it seems that because of the great capitalistic sense in this country, all of the states alfalfa was sold to Texas because of their drought.  and so,  since this spring has been not the usual spring,  there is NO alfalfa to be had.  Not a Leaf.  i tried to feed them grass hay that i COULD buy,  Wheat Grass, that i COULD buy,  and as i fed in the early morning, it was as if i was throwing NOTHING over the fence…they looked at me with such amazement…."What????  where is our FOOD?"  they were bewildered.

add to that that i had put off  doing something about the babies horn buds.  here it turns into more than you want to know.  but it Was.  i couldn't decide and finally decided to take them to the vet.  made the appointment.  $40/goat.  well…a LOT, but ok.  then,  by by some urge of intuition, went to talk with the County Extension Agent….who said to try the Other Vet.   long story short, $5 per goat because he is into 4H here.  $5 for disbudding/neutering the bucks.  so, i loaded them up, two babies and took them, them innocent and with little horn buds and it turned out that because of my putting it off so long,  the usual only modestly terrorizing cauterization needed to be a Totally Terrorizing sawing proceedure.  the little buck more so than the little doe.  and they have stitches that i can remove in 10 days which is the 19th.  ok.

so     ………………..         i am learning.  so much.  WHY?,  i wonder??????   but it IS what it IS and i need to do the very Best I can.   amidst this, they are loving beings.  very loving beings.  I open the door in the morning and one of them is like this

one of them, can you see her?,  one of them is watching for me.

amidst this, i stitch.  and realize more and more that Mending is really really, so much about Everything.  Everything. 

and as i am outside tonight, i see that different things have decided to grow here.  how interesting.

What IS this?  i don't know.  new. 

it's all new.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

a day of Hot dry Wind that was FULL of requirements away from home.  and coming home,  needing to hurry before dark to do what needed to be done.  and then,  being able to do what Wanted to be done for a while.

it's a quite large skirt i found a while ago.  very interesting design..many what do you call them, gores???  like inverted triangular shape inserts???? gores, i think.  anyway, i have this  idea for the Boro 2 class and i went through all the possible candidates for perfect fabric…this won out.  but none of the panels were the right size and so…i spent the evening taking it all apart.  i'll piece together pieces that ARE.  

finally going to bed,  i woke a couple hours later to that Moon, directly in the window that is at the head of the bed.  a cool breeze was fluttering the Green Tara wall tapestry.  i watched that for a while, listening to the night sounds.  i love it when i wake up like this….if i just wait a little while, everything i am dealing with during the day is so plainly laid out….       a lot of times i don't remember, don't try.  but last night, i was so grateful.  i NEEDED this.

ordinarily when things seem to be crowding up,  i begin each day with a list of what really needs to get done that day.  a vertical list.  prioritized.   but recently, it seems that this doesn't work…that it's a Horizontal listing of all #1 s…………ALL are top priority.   and there is also a strong sense of a very fragile balance.  a sense that a lot of things can slide on the side of going "wrong", or becoming very complicated beyond my knowing what to do.    And add to this, Jude's really amazing Boro 2 class which is bringing to light SO MUCH above and beyond stitching.  at this point i am just watching that, but am very energized  by how much the concept of Boro, of Mending  is really a complete metaphor for the Whole of my life.  and this is taking me one step closer to being about to find that state of equilibrium that is in quiet Response to life rather than Reaction.  this is beyond great.  What If something does go wrong?  What If things become too complicated?   When these feelings arise,  rather than following an urge to Prevent by figuring out some way to control things,  i find self just stopping and "looking"  and realizing ……..ok…….well, i'll just           MEND     it,  as best i can,  IF needed.   and the "as Best i can" part is critical.   Meeting what presents as it Arrives.  Doing the Best i can.

the Mexican Elderberry is blooming

the Feather Grass is showing up EVERYWHERE….and Strong

AND!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  the Indian Rice Grass that has seemed to just barely hang on in it's original clump that i planted in a really inopportune place about 3 years ago….that has gotten NO water from me this spring….is SEEDING!!!!!!!!!!!!   i have NO IDEA what to make of this.      

and…….the goats.   the babies are taking their rightful place in the herd.  they no longer run for their lives during the feeding frenzy.  hiding until it's quieted down.  they now come to the periphery of the whirl and dart in and out.  it's amazing how fast they are.   goats are NOT gentle creatures when living in a small area and being given alfalfa and pellets.  the competition knows no bounds.  pushing, shoving, head butting.  it's really something.   this morning i see that Onday has some discharge and is "bagging up".  so now, am watching closely.  on the horizontal to do list for today is to take out all the towels, be sure i know where the collar and leash are,  put a light bulb in the outside light and hook up the extensions.  ok.

and so it goes. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Jude's Spirit Cloth Contemporary Boro 2 class is causing me great comotion.   it is really GREAT, only the second day into it and i am heavy into thinking, remembering, thinking.

Clothing.  what we put on our bodies, against our skin, every day of our lives.  i don't have any time tonight to say much about it…need to get out for the Setting Sun Time with the goats, but i wanted to put these here to be sure i DO talk about it tomorrow, or soon.

Went to do my Alz B work and stopped by the Thrift Shop.  had Luck.  but except for the pants,  just the kind of rather ordinary luck i can expect.  it is the greatest Thrift Shop ever, really.

anyway:

top left,  a silk blouse.  really nice detail ,  beautiful pattern print.  very nicely worn.  Collar will come OFF and probably the sleeves.  below, a  silk blouse that sometimes looks black, sometimes a deep grey, sometimes even a deep indigo.  same with collar and sleeves.    AND THEN,  oh joy,  finally, a pair of camouflage pants!!!  been hoping for this for forever.  HEAVY cotton.  a couple holes, most notably in the butt.  LOVE these.

the reds are a cotton that will be cut up for whateverForever.  really like the colors.  and then, the Other thing.  it is that kind of cloth i can never remember the name of but in the second pic below, you can see the fibers of it and will know what i mean.  but it's an odd piece of clothing…i almost didn't take it but hmmm.  the piping is really interesting and the way the pocket is done is great too. and it really is nice ON.  the buttons are odd.  so, again, hmmmm.

so this is just to document the reality that i DO have a zillion choices.  Why do i choose NOT to wear any of them, really?  this is yet to come.  thinking.  now, am going out in my trusty denim jumper to sit with the goats and watch Sun disappear over the Rim.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

all along with this mending for goats,  there has been a strong sense of the cloth work Continuing in some silent    subliminal  way.   and this morning, YES!  suddenly i put together 3 pieces of floss, brown, red, orange to get the right color of blood and YES!,  knew to stitch across the lightning where it hits with its vertical  to give life to the horizontal!  and knew to use the stacked stitch to create the heartbeat, the pulse…………..  so, YES!….it all weaves together of it's own accord.

 

 

 

so after the birth of the first kids, the next big event was to seperate the bucks and does as they should be.  this worried me…., how it would go.   but, it WENT!  TaDa!!!
and pictured too, the  buck hut….for temporary shade, and shelter from storms.  it will be a very Boro construction. 

the does.  more peacefull now. 

and the bone face keeps a watchfull eye.

i have SO many images arising in my mind for cloth.

 

sitting down on the porch for the first time  yesterday,   watching this sky

This Morning….i thought there was nothing left in me but when i went out to feed and then take a look at what was accomplished yesterday…..look!   i think these might very well be images captured of all the Good Energies  being sent this way by You All………….Thank You

and i tied scraps on the new strip of fence so it's more visible. … can You see it?

and as they have, three times this week,  the "help" brought contributions to a potluck meal.   there were 9 of us, three children.  i didn't think it was going to happen Again,  so was unprepared with the Diaries Cloth on the table.  no time to put it back up on the wall,  i followed Jude's thinking and for the first time,  it was rolled and set to preside from the top of the futon couch.  i kept glancing over at it,  wondering.

 

 

OK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  THANKS JUDE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

this was the longest day yet. 

it began innocently and  almost peacefully.  but then,  the momentum rose. 

i don't really feel comfortable with     Help.  but i cannot put up all this fencing without it.  and so…help comes.  i have had more company in the last days than i have had for going on 17 years.  Everybody   loves   goats.  Everybody  wants to Help. 

and how do you think about this?  the little Julian, 2 and a half,  said to his mom when we left California that night last week with all the goats loaded in the horse trailer and truck …………………………"I guess they didn't want me."

how does an Old Nana deal with that?

i don't need any comments about this.  really.  but it is about Love and what that means.  to the Old and to the New who are just experiencing it for the first time.

and today when i was digging out a bush, i can't remember it's name at the moment, but a bush that would be in the area of the buck pen and i don't know if it is poisonous to them….i killed a snake.  with the shovel.  not even knowing it was there and why didn't it Run Away, but it didn't and i killed it. 

new life in a bigger pen.  where they can RUN. 

Pens.  i am thinking.  about pens.  about How It All Is.    complicated stuff.