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    i don't know why it's so important, trying to figure this out,   but i am anyway.

    what IS it about  the  Day to Day  flow of Spirit Cloth,  the quiet momentum of Magic Diaries?

    and maybe this might be some of it….

    it's the opportunity, the priviledge of going along with Jude's mind,  as it moves through her world and life.    last night i am sitting in the almost dark, looking at that piece of cloth,  thinking, looking, and i get the pencil and draw just a little.    this morning i click into the MotherShip and   Ahhhhh,  she has been doing the same.  today is a tree,  a 9Patch tree with a magic 9 patch acorn.   and i nod.

    for all of us who say we   Oh so much Want to,  we Would, If we could,  but we Can't, for Whatever reason…           Watching  someone     DO     it,  keeps what is inside each of us alive.  Keeps us remembering, everytime we look,  some little beautiful thought or image we had that we let fall away because of ……..something.  

    ???? maybe this is it, or at least a significant part of It.   being constantly reminded that the cloth, the stitching,  to become what it Can be,  needs to be a constant companion with all the rest of our doings?

     

  • can you see them?  two more strands each….of all colors, brown….

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    and they HAVE done something really great…it's almost impossible to believe, but they have changed the whole energy of this cloth.  it has become one.   two of the three panels are now One, and really, all three, because just the hint to the right side has pulled it in.  Oh Sigh of Happiness.  i could  ~feel~ it happening even before i finished the stitching and hung it back on the wall…..

    so, off now to buy a tarp for the wood pile.  the snows of Colorado are sliding down toward N Mex, no snow here but probably rain. 

    before i go, though, look what happened here!   as i was waiting for the fire to get going this morning, i noticed a really "nothing" scrap from a Deb Lacativa stuck in the magazine rack.  having loved the beautiful creature on Spirit Cloth this morning, and having thought more about literal/non literal (re: my mammal lizard)  i put her on the morning glory.  too wide.  cut off the one edge which then became perfect legs.   Hey ho.

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  • all i did today was sew grass stems.  i started out using just a single strand of embroidery floss.  that got old quick.  so i changed to two.  two different colors.  better.  but it's slo going.  i finished two grass stems, bottom to top.  took a pic and they don't show at all yet.  and the first is doubled, so that one has 4 threads.    more.   maybe after tomorrow there will be something to actually see. 

    in person, they are visible…i like them a lot.  i will add all the things that grasses have, those poetic things, the sheaths, inflorescences, rachias, lemmas, spiklets, glumes, anthers and awns…all of it. this part will take a long time.  the leaves too…      as i look today, i think at least three stems on each side, maybe more but fore sure, 3.  they arch from bottom of the cloth to the top.  it's good.  just nothing you can see yet.

    and in the middle of it, i was searching for a little shirt that has fabric i want on it somewhere,  and didn't find it yet, but did find the following that was from Cloth to Cloth.  i like it and maybe will stitch on it off and on when the stems wear me out????  the woven strips are ones i dyed……

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  • now it's a Monday.     and i am still a little bit back in Saturday and SunDay.    thinking.

    What is the difference…why? 

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    it's interesting how this came up now.    a good time, maybe, or as good a time as any, to wonder a little.   and do i have any lingering urge for the "dolls"?   no.

    it just "got finished", is all i can come up with when i try to.  that part of me that was in the center, looking out,   just got finished.  and maybe began becoming some kind of self that is more simple,  just a        part         of some Undefined whole?

    maybe  that's the important  word:  defined    ~  undefined.

    i don't know.  but as i am thinking this morning, i am realizing that i don't have any sustained interest in         defining it, really.            so,  the cloth is spread on the doortable.  waiting.

  • and it has held.

    a lot of times, i get these flashes, floods of understanding, of some new sense of equilibrium

    and then,  they fade.   they most often DO return, but it takes time.  This time, tho, it is remaining and remaining steady.  again, i am gratefull to Irene for finding the exact words, the exact arrangement that created this. 

    so, i am weaving things together.  selves,  doings.  everyday i split more wood and stack it.  there is a good rhythm to that.  last week, as i had mentioned, i made a Friend.  Tawanna.  she came.  we spent the afternoon.  some outside, talking about the land, the plant people.  some in the house and then, most on the porch.  sitting.  i gave her the top step.  and we just talked.  as Margaret said, in the last post, there were many familiarities/similarities.  it is enough for now.  i have sailed it out into the Universe.  letting it drift now.  what wants to happen will.

    the Diaries Cloth:  i basted on a piece of raw silk noile to the back.  i wanted to feel the needle going through both pieces.  one wasn't right. 

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    then, as posted in SEW, some details, finally

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    somewhere, i think in a comment, i said something about learning about being literal and more free, abstract………..well, today i struggled with that.   the first of the little lizards.  and it took pretty much all day,  in between the wood work and then, making    donuts   of all things, but, really was the Center of the day……..i think i was NOT successful.  but i'll give it some time.

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    i should have had a contest or something so see if anyone could guess what this is….but i'm not much for that, so i'll just tell you.  it's my lizards here.  the ones with the blue tails, bellys and throats.  but it kinda caught me up in detail and it looks maybe more like a long tailed mammal? well, i'll look again in the morning. 

    and then, i stitched down some on one of the outer rim butterflies…that i am hoping will draw everything IN.  this was as i'd envisioned it

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    it's SunDay night.  i am thinking about Jude being incomunicado (sp) for some days.  what would that be like, i am asking self….if i were just on my own.

     

     

     

     

  • Linda was curious about the dolls.    here are the two, beside the grass person, that i kept:

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    kneeling and seated.  both have armatures.   i didn't keep these two because they were particularly good, but because for whatever reason, i loved them a lot.   many of the faces of others were more refined, "better",  but from these, you get the idea.    i sold many many of them over some years.  some were even life size.   for a while, some had  "masks" of birds…hawks and of coyote.  most were wall hanging figures…dancing women, flying women, dreaming women, running woman, women grieving, women singing, praying, holding things,  small animals, banners, flags, bowls.   some were non gender…my favorite one like that had a small bird perched on it's head.   there were many Wind figures,  young wind, Women wind and obviously male figures,  Wind as lover.

    and then,  it just became harder and harder for me to want to deal with selling them.  with packing them up and sending them to different places.    and life in general became almost more than i could deal with then, so i just quit making them.   when  my life became my own again, i tried to begin again but it just wouldn't happen.  and i realized that enough had changed.  that i was no longer able to focus on a central figure, that the world that the figure "lived" in was of equal or more interest to me.     the being and the being's world. 

    and this was how it was until Spirit Cloth.

     

     

     

     

     

     

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    Yes.  She, Irene, said yes.

    yes…i can put her words here…..

    "….Circle of regeneration begins as darkness ripens…."

     

    i have to go to work but these words will be the words that thread through the next months.   or, maybe it's the other way around, that the next months will thread through them….  or both.

    Thank you, Irene.

     

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    neither of these two pics look like much, but they are really,    uhhhhh

    well, significant.

    significant because of some oh so welcomed      SHIFT       in my experience of this time of year.

    LOOK!, it is 7:46pm.  Outside, it is dark.  very dark.  not All the Stars Visible dark yet, but dark.

    and i am

    happy.     so,

    i am waiting for an email response from Irene, who commented on Jude's blog about Moonflight  with the most totally perfect words for what i am experiencing.  i want to quote her.  am waiting for permission.           and waiting in almost ecstatic way.  who'dve guessed.

     

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    how did this happen?      i have never seen this before…a caterpillar, i think a hornworm,  tomato worm,  mummified, just lying quietly, all dried out but complete, under the  wild datura 

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    the grasshoppers are tired, but continuing to diligently mate.