Maybe this is the Celebration. Yes. it Is.
ok., Then. it's tonight that is the Celebration that came of its own accord. ok.
in Jude's Diaries there are Windows. and i read, listen, think. Windows. hmmmm. and then, this evening.
i began this day at first light. soon after i was Out There, at work. shoveling out the Bedroom side of the Albatros. a few Wheelbarrows over to the compost hills. they are Hills now. i need to think what to do with all this wonderful compost. more than i need. FreeCycle it. yes. and ok, but just continuing on for the moment. all day. off and on. Bill, Alz B's son comes out of the blue with Paul who DOES WORK and they take apart the plumbing under the house and make a plan, with no one actually consulting me, but i am beginning to just accept that as part of the Unforseen. WHY? does Bill do these things?????? because i remind him of his father?…we are so similar, his father and me, or , because i am the one who shares his Mother's, Alz B, end time? Who knows. a karmic thing, for sure, but who can really know? and there is just so much to DO that i no longer can spend much time thinking about it.
so inbetween dealing with them and what they are doing which includes two of Bill's dogs that have come along, i Just Go with getting everything ready out there for that moment when i hear the
sharp bleat
that means Lucky Star's water is broken.
maybe Tuesday?
she is bagged up. like really bagged up. quite impressive.
and today, i began this day so early, shoveling, loading, hauling, moving, wiring, changing, ripping (cloths for the babies nostrils), washing (water bowls, food bowls for the maternity ward), and it was 99 degrees. Full Sun. Where did Wind go????? when we need him?????? sleeping, i guess. and then, after a lot of Stuff, it was dark. and i was watering the vegetable plants "by heart" because i couldn't really See them. it was dark. but what i could see is the movement of TOADS, many, here and there so to celebrate for the First Toad Night. i think they have been there for a while, but i was not out there so late.
and i want to say that i am finding the conversation of the last days so good here. and that i want to say to Susan C and even Cindy and Even Saskia, that what i see glowing now in my womanhood is
Stamina.
Stamina in the form of Just Going and for this, i am beyond grateful to Jude, for wording the Thing of it…Just Going.
Stamina. i had SO much, all my life that was really quite amazing. but now, in these days, i have stamina. i have an understanding of determination. i have a becoming understanding of Just Going and i am feeling very much like a Celebration tonight. i am WORN OUT. but i have accomplished MORE than i ever did before in my life and it will seep in to the birthing of Goats and the growing of food and the blossoming of trees and the making of Cloths and i cannot think of one single thing that could possibly be Better.
so.
HooRay and just LOVE to Just Going. in all its forms and all its Unforseen. OH, HOORAY! and
eeeeeEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE.
windthread 
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