what? does one do when woken at around 2 something A.M. because it's raining in the window on your head?????
go look for the push pins that pin the plastic closed over it, the window, not the head, and while at it, notice how the colors look on the chair and find the camera, take a pic.
so it started again at about 2 a.m. and continued HEAVY, some reprieve for about 20 min at about 10:30 a.m….fed the Goats…and then on until somewhere around well, 2:30 p.m. during that Rain time, i thickened the stick for the Flag. no point in showing that. and i finally cleaned up the table. no point in showing that. during the 15 minutes i collected some marigolds and some of the pods of Doris's Snake Tree
and once it was SUN SHINING, i spent the afternoon early eve pulling the giant Kochia weeds, flinging them over the fences to the Goats. Wishing i could just let them loose to forage for themselves, which they would LOVE, but would this would also include the remaining trees and bushes. i'm not ready for that yet. maybe never. Because of the Rain, they literally slid out of the earth. so i pulled and flung, pulled and flung. often forgetting myself by the rhythm of it. toward the end of the day i moved over near the Buck Pen so i could eavesdrop on them. When i go to the fence, there is all the pushing and jealousy. so i didn't. i knelt down and pulled that way or squatting, and just listened. Things have changed a lot for Gideon. his arthritis is really crippling. but he gets around. no longer is the dominate Buck he was, but also, next in line is his son, Sunny Ray, who is pretty much all talk. so i listened to the talk. it's really quite endearing. he practices on his Father and Guideon just stands there, listening. and really, i'm pretty sure, appreciates the homage and attention. Sexuality to Goats is just that. a Feeling. anyone can be the object of the Feeling. They don't mind. Whatever.
Gideon, the subdued old man
Gideon's son. Sunny Ray. one year old and just coming into his own. the most overtly virile. but also the same sweetness from when he was a baby. he would love it if i came into their pen and he could try to sit on my lap. i wish he could too. but he is too big and his lap sitting feelings are tangled up in other kinds of feelings. and so.
his horns are scurs. unsuccessful attempt at disbudding. so…they are There, but also for whatever reason that no one knows really, i've searched and searched for info, also don't give him the same sense of dominance that Buckwheat had with his natural horns. maybe because many of the nerves are dead? it's interesting. it's almost as if he doesn't know he has horns. he doesn't take advantage of them at all.
and then, there is TenZen.
named after the Dalai Lama. Daughter bought him from a breeder in Boston, Mass. he flew here in a cargo plane at 3 mos. the most gentle of all. the most unassuming. the most willing to give way. He accomodates Sunny Ray every morning by doing the head butting routine atop their shelter house. he wins sometimes. sometimes doesn't. but it's all the same to him. he is shy and skittish to a lot of overt handling but does love to be touched. all while i was pulling weeds out there, he talked to me. has a very soft voice, surprisingly soft and he talked. we had a LOT of eye contact. he's good at that.
so
i listened to them. watched them through my squatted spots among the tall weeds. soon, any day, really, i'll have to put little Nogal in there. When i put Sunny Ray in there last year, i was so angry at him. he was i think the same age really as Nogal. but it was the day that Lucky Star was kidding and all the does were in that front pen and anxious. Sunny Ray was too. but his way of expressing his anxiety was to mount everyone as best he could over and over, mumble his very best love words over and over and i was so frustrated i just left Lucky Star's side and grabbed him and stuck him in with Gideon, TenZen and Buckwheat. Done. it was the last kidding and i was exhausted and didn't have an inch of energy left for anything. remember, 14 kids were born. and he, Sunny Ray, was miserable for days. he hid. he cried for his mother. he hid and he cried. and then, suddenly, it was done. Buckwheat and Gideon pushed him around for a couple months and then just ignorned him.
and here we go again. THIS year. i keep Nogal to keep Buckwheats genetics for Jenny's herd. and as i watched and listened today, i worked to understand the way They experience things. Nogal will miss his mother for some days. but he is a Buck. his Buckness is what he IS. and i am hoping he can find his place with them. if not, i'll take him to the vet and get him surgically castrated. he can live a softer, less energetic life that way. but …..
so…the end of maybe the last of the BIG RAIN days of 2013.
windthread 
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