It never occured to me that it would be difficult. Coming to the end of 365 days. That it would be a dilemma of Now What?.? But it is. And i really have no answer.
First i want to THANK YOU ALL for hanging out with me. I have appreciated So Much all that You have given me with your thoughts and love. I have been able to see so much more as You have looked with me. And over time, that Deepening sense of What We Are. In Common. Together. Us. Nothing could be Finer. Nothing. Than to find ourselves woven into eachother's days.
The year has unfolded of its own accord. This time last year I was still looking for "meaning". I think looking for some significant Event, Experience, Doing which would satisfy that search.
But what i've realized in the last couple days (as i have gone back, only some,….it was overwhelming to try to go back through it all) is that something else happened entirely.
Posting every day became a TOOL.
that slowly, without my even being aware of it taught me to stay in a day. One single day. This day. Today.
Unmoored from the past, unattached to any future. Just a singular one and only day. to live that day fully and look long. It broke the lifelong habit of that kind of Julia Cameron Morning Pages person that remained somewhat, ummmm, somewhat more attached to the "thoughts about" than the "experience of". I don't know if this makes sense, but it is a HUGE and Wonder Full realization.
So, now? Me, the cloth, the Goats, the Cat, the Dog, the Land….we might be here for the long haul. Who Knows? So…I think i'll just go. One day at a time.
Today, this day, ending with SO MUCH WIND. I put a new wall on the Buck Hut just in time for this stormy night of maybe rain, maybe snow. and i don't have a clue Why, but they were all so gentlemanly. More than ever before. Taking close interest in the doings, receiving love in the form of scratching and touch, and not finding it necessary to EXPRESS THAT BACK in their usual bucky ways. Just being there. with me. i don't know what to think.

and i had to bring the truck in to unload the feed. Days like this you have to tie the gate open against the WIND.
and as a SURPRISE, Marti and her husband arrived with the 4 Native Plum trees i'd ordered from Plants of the Southwest in Albuquerque. That i'd thought i'd go pick up at their house when the car gets fixed. But they BROUGHT them! and we bagged some mulch for their garden beds.
After they left I readied things. Put on my Hundertwasser bracelet and signaled to Snowbunny. Ready???? Opened the gates and made an OH SO SMOOTH, smooth, smooth transition from the Way Back to the Front. Flawless. Just in time ahead of the Storm. it was Beauty Full. Lucky Star and the young ones in the middle. Perfect harmony. One Mind. A Herd. We were like the Wildebeests crossing the Serengeti. And the Crows came low…their wings outstretched but still. Not moving. Just riding the Wind.
it's a New Moon tonight. before i go to sleep, i'll plant the seeds.
What comes after 365? i guess…..366.
Love to You All,

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