i tried off and on today to sit down and actually write some things ahead of this post so i could be at least a little clear.  But for whatever reason, it seems that i can't do that anymore.  I just need to sit down at the end of a day,  or close to the end and write whatever comes out of my fingers.

But i did think of many things,  how it's all merging.  Things are merging.   I got the Trungpa book off the shelf and  here it is again…how many times have i written about this here…???  But again………….

"The natural law and order of this world is not "for" or "against".  Fundamentally, there is nothing that either threatens us or promotes our point of view.  The four seasons occur free from anyone's demand or vote.  Hope and fear cannot alter the seasons.  There is day, there is night.  There is darkness at night and light during the day, and so no one has to turn a switch on and off.  There is a natural law and order that allows us to survive and that is basically good,  good in that it is there and it works and it is efficient."

Shambhala,  The Sacred Path of the Warrior,  Chogyam Trungpa, Cpt .  3  The Genuine Heart of Sadness   about Basic Goodness.

and that i first read in the 1970's sometime.  Here we are so many years later and it All continues to merge and I see and feel.

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and this is a cloth about that.  About how it is all merging,  how it feels like Sky/Earth/all upon, under, inbetween is only one continuous thing.  this would include me.  I can no longer seperate the thing that i am from all the rest…the edges are sticky and enter one into the other.  Yet still,  in the moment i began this cloth, as above,  in September,  i still identify Sky/Earth, rocks, minerals, Air, and Water as somekind of She.   And that's ok for now i think.  I remember that day, when this cloth first began and i stood Out Side There and raised my arms up to All that is above the Earth and said

"Breathe Me!!"   

so she was the Breather.  

and to go on about the cloth itself,  i have a tendancy to be ok with Edgy.  Even like things that are edgy.  I look for faces and eyes that are not,  uhhhh,   ordinarily human, but rather less than,  vague and well, Free of humanness.  Free of all it is that i am.  That are Beyond that.  So i was looking for that here.  

And now a while later,  i am looking again.  Though i find this face to be the face that i was needing in that moment in September,  it wasn't a face that was ….well, i guess…kind of Universal.  It may have been a face that really said the opposite of what i felt it to be….

and so.  I think of making Cloth.  Story Cloth.  Stories of moments that i experience.  and i ask self if it is enough that they tell ME the story?  or do i want them to tell a story for Others too.  And i do.  I want them to tell a story for Others too.   

So i am looking.  How Else can i say it?….tell the story of that moment without Compromising the story?

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Looking.

 

 

 

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19 responses to “more of the Beauty Full Just Going”

  1. yvette Avatar

    looking
    yes..at the moment i feel so much searche inside
    lost control
    but then you are open to receive i think
    scary to have no visible center ( for me)

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  2. patriciaspangler47@gmail.com Avatar

    i’m not sure of the progression here…where you are with the cloth…where the cloth is in the process, but i will say that as one of the “others” wanting to know the story here, i so deeply resonate with the 2nd image. for me it spins numerous sub-texts— takes many many forms…leads me down numerous paths that all seem to arrive at the same place. the heart of it all….

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  3. Liz Avatar

    Thank you for the close-up detail at the end … such spare lines that carry so much meaning …

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  4. dee Avatar

    showing up here today seemed like it might be okay — sticking with Trungpa’s ideas of there being no “for” or “against”… in my collaging this week, I find Goat and Wind and think of you. (I still have my Trungpa books from the 70’s, too — perhaps I’ll pull one down and take a peek).

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  5. .cynthia Avatar
    .cynthia

    i am looking out at a sky that is gray..but far away and over the notch it mimics the left corner..a small beacon making the snow falling even more intense..and i am here being an other..wondering at that..these cloths..so uniquely yours and yet i look into them a read parts of myself..i see your mysteries and questions and yet find my own ..i watch for other familiar names in the comments and wait with anticipation to see how they are touched ..how we resonate ..some time such an exact response and sometimes such difference..and i stretch into looking at things ..at the world..inner and outer in slightly different way..looking..seeing..gentle day grace

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  6. jude Avatar

    i wonder if the whole idea of order is just that. how it might happen in our minds.

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  7. .cynthia Avatar
    .cynthia

    …and so not wanting exactly to be political ..or imagine the universal…but all morning my husband has had on the news..and against the background of my thoughts and visions of the breather..of you with your arms up saying breathe me…
    there is the background of i can’t breathe..we can’t breathe..and it all crashes in my mind..and i am here once more taking in the face of the breather and all she holds

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  8. Mo Crow Avatar

    putting a face on the energies…

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  9. grace Avatar

    i wonder sometimes about never seeing things on TV. What i have
    is just the ordinary Google News list and when i choose to go
    to Democracy Now, which i don’t do every day. So often, i have
    no SOUND to these things in this world that are political/socio-economic but above all human in the Least of what could be.
    and yes…that day when i Called Out, Breathe Me! it was out of
    angst for humanity…myself just small, like that stick figure
    in the bottom of this cloth…
    we remain childishly Ignorant as a species in knowing how to move toward the WellBeing of the Whole…again, i will need to go back to Plant Intelligence and the Imaginal Realm…so much there to
    absorbe about the INTELLIGENCE that is constantly moving AROUND
    the human species to Hold Place while we act out our choice of ignorance. In the last months all this has remained as an under thread and i work to know how to ally myself with this Feminine Energy Form i try to depict in this cloth. An Energy that is
    so beyond REAL but not seen because of the Magnitude of It so i
    give It this “face” which is not a face, but the 5 things a face will have…2 eyes, 2 nostril, a mouth….the things of so many birds, reptiles, fish, amphibians, mammals, mammals of which we are one….
    it’s all so Immense. And whether or not the energy of a single human being has any effect on anything at all, and i have no
    real for sure feeling of an answer to that, i only can know that
    old thing about expansion/contraction that i took in and understood many years ago when i was beginning to want to learn Things…
    that in some circumstances of experience i can feel so Contracted, so defended Against but in others i can feel the edges of what i know to be my self EXPAND out become permeable and that’s what
    Her Breath gives me…the ability to Expand, even if just for moments at a time. And it is from within this Expanded self of
    no fear, no need of defense that i want to move in this world. To what End, i can never know. But i know it feels Right, True.
    i love you, Cynthia

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  10. Mo Crow Avatar
  11. .cynthia Avatar
    .cynthia

    thank you grace in and out and thank you

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  12. grace Avatar

    well…we always kind of have no visible center…we fill in the blanks

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  13. grace Avatar

    i’m not anywhere with the progression yet…just looking for
    what can tell the story and have yet to find the pieces

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  14. grace Avatar

    i love us there…me, animal

    Like

  15. grace Avatar

    ahhhh, Goat and Wind…did you post that yet?
    Shambhala is the only one i have kept, and i keep going back
    into it year after year after year

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  16. grace Avatar

    it is my hope that aside from my own sense of it, the
    cloths will be able to tell as many stories as are asked of them

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  17. grace Avatar

    there’s really nothing else, is there

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  18. grace Avatar

    it is, Mo. How that so basic urge remains in us…from cultural
    imprinting maybe or from just some way farther back need to
    Connect with Everything,
    but that urge for Prayer IS there….the urge for asking,
    for grace, for mercy,

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  19. Michelle in NYC Avatar

    Grace TONIGHT it’s FULL http://earthsky.org/tonight
    AND
    about Intelligence (I’m re-reading Osho) http://www.osho.be/New-Osho-NL/EnglBooks/Intelligence.htm
    and
    BREATHE IS SO TIMELY and SO very FINE.

    Like

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