windthread

Urge:  strong desire, impulse, wish, need, compulsion, longing, yearning, hankering, craving,  appetite, hunger, thirst, yen,  itch     Which of these definitions ?  i guess strong desire

the Urge for Distraction.   Day is gray (e?) but with sudden so short lived bursts of Sunlight then grey.  a nothing kind of greyness.  a Wetness.  a flatness. The snow has almost all melted into mud.    Chinche remains completely still.  She has not moved.  Not at all.  Only her eyelids.    Tay is restless.  Wants to be OutSide but there is no even semi dry place to lay and chew a stick.  She wants me to go Out and Do something,  anything,  but i don't.  

I stitch.

it has to be flat for this stitching,  it's kind of a sheeting,  this cotton,  not easy to stitch,  so i use an old drawing board on my lap,  keep it flat.  It's awkward.  But it goes.  Invisible baste,  of Jude Hill, Spirit Cloth,  which is no longer a "baste" for me,  but a compositional Stitch.  Basting down all the dominant folds and lines,  leaving short ones for how it can go later.

Stitch, Stitch, Stitch

and

Think, think, think.   And in a certain way,  it's a Perfect day because of the horribly strong urge for DISTRACTION of ANY KIND but there being none and i am watching closely because i Could Cause a distraction,  like suddenly need to run into town real quick for something,  or a phone call or or or but i don't.  I just observe self having this really uncomfortable URGE and how it manifests as thoughts……thoughts that come and go so swiftly,  never even being completed,  just arising with a few images and forms,  or, really, even less than a few,  maybe just one sometimes, and then immediately dissolving into the next one,  how amazing it is that there seems to be a limitless line of them ready,  one after the other, limitless, just fragments and i see how meaningless they really Are,  thoughts….Why do i HAVE them?  What purpose do they Serve?  

So i breathe and stitch.  At the "end of the day",  which means around Sun set for me right now,  i picked up the Cloth and a zing of Thrill went through me….how the stitches have CHANGED the cloth,  how it suddenly has an entirely different character,  how it is so completely a Different Thing than it was in the beginning,  so  i feel a small sense of having been Distracted by this sensation.  I feed Goats,  feed Tay, Tazmeena.  Feed self.  Sit with Chinche a while.  and find self looking forward to tomorrow,  what will happen with the Cloth tomorrow.  

on the back of the futon in late late afternoon Sun

and i DID drink flowers.   Taking Root…you can google that..from Cynthia from the wild lands of Vermont.   Breathe Deep tea.  Hawthorn, Spearmint, Hyssop, Elderflower, Eucalyptus, Fennel, Calendula and Peppermint   organically grown or ethically wild harvested