i got a phone call from Chloe.  We worked together many years at University of Michigan Adult Psych Hospital.  From in our twenties.  She left  before i did,  bought a small farm in Missouri.  Set out.  A single woman,  no children.  Still.  

she called because she is beside herself with the turn of events.  Freaked.  Like me.  We talked some about it and when i said…what are we going to do….she said, 

"well,  what i'm going to do right now is come pick you up and we'll go to the Grand Canyon. "

i said,  surprised,  well…May is a good month to visit here.  and she said no…i mean now.  I'm coming now.  

and i began hearing myself say all the things i say about how now is not a great time to visit,  it's getting cold OutSide,  the in your face Dog,  the fact that when the wood burns out it's really very cold in here at night already,  that it's not much of a Destination place,  and that i can't go to the Grand Canyon….i have Goats…and more.   but she just was quiet on the other end of the phone.  So i said, i need to get out to feed them now.  I'll call you tomorrow.  

it's been i guess 35 years since i've seen her.  I took the kids once when they were little to visit there.  We spent all our time walking to the creek near her house,  the kids IN it,  building water worlds for minnows and crayfish.  She had a box turtle that lived under her deck.  that came and went everyday, that we layed in the grass and watched for its  coming and going.  

she's a basket maker,  or was.  not so much anymore.

so,  i called her back last eve.  Thinking that she would have thought better of it.   said…so, what are you going to do?  She is going to be here on Saturday.  Driving from Missouri.  She will leave to go back home on Monday and skip the Grand Canyon part, she said.  She will bring trout.  She's a fisherwoman.

!

so….there's lots to do to be ready for company other than my kids who know how i live.

 

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the Door Work Table is still up…it's next to the futon couch where she will sleep.  I need to do something about that for starters

 

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and the table in the ROOM where normal people eat,  where we will sit to eat the trout,  

 

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wood box….needs to be brimming.  

over these years,  there are maybe once in a while letters.  you know the kind.   I think 3 phones.

i look SO forward to her being here.  Sitting face to face,  how we have such a long history that began when we were young and so sure of every thing.  She's 73.  I'm going to be 71.  How funny we will be to one another in our present forms and at this Startling Moment in this world,  trying to figure  it all out.

So…don't know how much i'll be able to be here for these days…maybe just pics?,  or maybe words

 

 

 

 

 

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24 responses to “friend comes”

  1. sue Avatar

    good stuff.. enjoy

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  2. Mo Crow Avatar

    connections with deep heart

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  3. Cheryl Avatar
    Cheryl

    Years ago, before Ma Bell was divided and before it re-morphed into AT&T, they had an ad campaign that said, “You can only tell an old friend what’s new.” I’m so happy for you that you get to sit face-to-face with an old friend and share heartfelt space.

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  4. cathy Avatar

    What a beautiful tribute to you, that she wants to drive so far just to see you for a few days face to face. And without the Grand Canyon. Wow.

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  5. Nanette Avatar

    Oh! Good-ON- Chloe! This will be special, but I also know what you mean when you say about “company other than my kids who know how I live”…that little frission of nervousness. She loves you, she’ll only see you, it’ll be wonderful.

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  6. Tina Avatar
    Tina

    So excited for you both … forever friends are the very best friends.
    Sending you both love and happiness. Woohoo I am so excited for you ladies ….

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  7. grace Avatar

    it’s really something, isn’t it.

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  8. grace Avatar
  9. grace Avatar

    how those connections continue to pulse forever

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  10. grace Avatar

    and what will we make of It all….

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  11. grace Avatar

    yes. without the Grand Canyon. it’s really really SomeThing.

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  12. grace Avatar

    it will. it will.

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  13. grace Avatar

    i’ll tell You all about it.

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  14. grace Avatar

    it’s funny, really. In the second conversation that i called
    Full Disclosure
    i listed all the things that makes this not a Destination.
    several.
    There was just
    quiet
    on her end of the phone.
    And really, i don’t do any more or less housekeeping than i did in those years in Ann Arbor when i had a regular house.
    this is not a regular house. that’s the difference.
    but i CHOSE this.
    I said….this is enough. Me and my stuff is dry. my stuff has a shelf to rest on. I am warm enough that i don’t die.
    i look at this, and it’s not the first time, so i’m looking again. What i wanted to know those many years ago is
    What is the Bottom Line? as in what is NEEDED.
    So…WHY am i so shy about this now? I wasn’t for many many
    years. Why am i so shy about it now?
    something to look at and
    “get right” with, i think
    Love you, Nanette

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  15. Marti Avatar
    Marti

    You know what grace – the state of your home or even the type of home you live in does NOT matter. To friends, what is important, is not a dusted, swept, immaculate place but the deep joy of spending time with you. You make all welcome and create a haven of comfort, connection and caring in your home.
    In the days ahead of us, you have said that you don’t want optimism but determination. Chloe’s visit is a great example of determination and is quite the gift for you this weekend.

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  16. jude Avatar

    have a good sit.

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  17. grace Avatar

    yes, i know that, and You know i know that. That it is
    what it is and it’s fine.
    but still
    there’s that “something”….that always rises up at times
    like this. Would be nice to know what the cause is.
    and i laughed just now…in the ROOM, you know the windows
    we put in there, daughter and i, salvaged from the guy
    down the road’s back yard…old ones in the first place, and
    kind of ify but that i love so much because of being old
    and ify,
    anyway…how they don’t exactly fit and really Can’t fit because of their nature and the nature of the ROOM, well…the
    plastic grocery bags that are stuck in to the gap of that one
    right by the back door…maybe a quarter inch gap narrowing to
    less…..
    so they had somehow come loose, the bags, sometime in the last
    weeks, fallen out and have been sitting there on the ledge
    by Tazmeena’s food bowls where i could notice them often,
    Did i DO something about that?, no. Other than notice, no.
    But this morning WIND has returned and is coming in through
    that gap and being November, is cold. A breeze.
    so i got the screwdriver and jammed them back into that gap.
    Tight. and there’s no breeze now. Fixed. good enough.
    so here’s a perfect example for me to work with.
    and yes. her visit is a Gift.

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  18. grace Avatar

    if she’s willing, we’ll go down to the Festival of the Cranes.

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  19. Marti Avatar
    Marti

    Always amazed at those windows, how you and Jenny redid the room, put in the windows, etc. Remember before walls were torn down, how it looked, how you said you wanted to expand and you did, you opened it all up…such an achievement.
    Have my own plastic bag story: This rental house is pretty well built but in the tiny kitchen, large expanse of glass sliding doors. When we get the cold and by the way, first frost is tonight along with high winds and soon I imagine some snow will fall, the kitchen gets cold and I always feel like the cold is creeping underneath the glass sliding doors. I’ve looked at the fancy cloth “snakes” that you can buy to put against the bottom of the door. Have said, well I have a lot of dyed cloth that I could stuff and make my own keeper out of cold but what do I do every year…I get out a humungo lavender beach towel that friends left when they visited us when we lived in Maui, roll it up and place it against the glass doors…

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  20. Kristin Avatar
    Kristin

    whatever your home is will be just right…you will fill the space with you and she will fill the space with her and there will be as if no time has passed since you sat and shared stories…time…a meal…that deep, in the bones friendship. There will be enough of everything to make the time go well…the skies will paint pictures for you to take in together, the goats will add sound and some mix of tasks to do at specific times, and Tay will be beside you watching, listening.
    A truly fine place for her to rest after the drive….and it will be, for sure, as though no time has passed since you hugged, and shared and were as friends are, just who you are.
    Much good energy flowing out to you dear Grace as you do that bustling about thing you so often write about when company is coming. Looking forward to photos, and when time, words….enjoy fully this gift of time shared.

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  21. grace Avatar

    that bustling about thing….yes. that bustling about thing.
    We’ve been through it before, haven’t we. Today i thought i
    shouldn’t be such a blabbermouth…i’ve done this before, no
    need to perpetrate it again, but then now at the end of the day i think it’s ok and well, ok. Because it got me to the word of Pretense from Rinpoche. And it somehow feels like it’s maybe
    settled. That maybe i can see and accept that it’s true. I can’t have it both ways.

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  22. handstories Avatar

    dear grace, you give me hope and smiles, for how things can be.

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  23. Morna Avatar

    I think it is all perfect, but I do know how easily we slip into self-critique – and it’s not even really SELF… it’s HOUSE and whether or not the way we live “proves” that we’ve succeeded. STUPID. It is all PERFECT. xo

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