windthread

so i got there.  One minute late.  The entire court was filled with potential jurors.  Was directed to the court clerk to sign in and gave her my paper that i'd received in the mail.

 

this pic is from yesterday….the new HUGE tarp on the Alfalfa half ton bale. Beyond Awkward. This morning it was drizzling and there was….Fog….and it was all spongy underfoot and my socks were wet through the holes in my crocs and i Fed over an hour early…all Them still just waking up and trying to take in a very wet morning…not ready to eat and the feed getting drizzled on,  but me being the responsible citizen went forward so i could get there at the appointed hour.  And she logged me in with her computer and said ok,  gesturing across the hall to the FULL courtroom and i said….I need to go.  Do you remember when i called the other day  and you told me that if i was moving,  all i needed to do was Show Up?????  She remembered and said well if you will just sit through the morning…which meant sit through the initial sifting of jurists and i said NO….i need to leave now. I have Goats.   Silence.

and i remembered my X wood woman,  Judy of the Navajo Nation who told me how to do things.  Say what you want/need.  If they say no,  say it again and then just look down.  There will be silence.  it's uncomfortable.  But just keep looking down.  In the end,  just to break the silence,  they will say ok.   

in this moment,  i remembered that.  I didn't look down.  I looked directly into her face.  And after a few moments i said…

even if i would still be living here,  even if i wasn't moving,  they wouldn't want me.  Because there is Nothing that is beyond a shadow of a doubt.  I would cause hung jury after hung jury. Nothing is beyond a shadow of a doubt.  and then i looked away.  She handed me my paper and said ok.  Go.  and i did.

Julie,  of Threading the Dog,  wants to see a Scur Basket

 

 

 

the one under the Dalai Lama is this recent one of Sunny Ray.  The two that appear paired, are.  They are from Nogal.  The rest from various Goats,  including Barbara and Magic who i gave to Kelly because of the scurs,  because she had a partner who could help her manage them…if there is a partner,  there's not so much an issue as there is, me alone.  So different ones,  over these 5 years…that one at bottom left that looks like a tongue…that was Barbara's.

the teeny one from the other vet in town who wasn't into dealing with scurs.  so,  just the tip.

Scurs.  This is to Mo first….

Disbudding.   If you intend to take your Goats to any kind of "show",  as in competition, or the State Fair,  they cannot have horns.  So you disbud them.  Which means when they are just a couple or few days old,  you BURN the horn buds.  There is a specific tool for this.  If done successfully,  they will not grow horns.  If not successful,  they will grow mutant horns that often curve IN…as into the skull.  As in all the horns you see above.   Most times,  Goats with problem scurs are culled.  As in killed.

Natural horns.  I don't know.  Natural horns.  Arctica has her natural horns and also got her head stuck in the fence around the Way Back Oasis….3 times before she learned.  If  i'd not been home,  she would have died.  I was and heard her and went out and cut the fence,  freeing her. 

This is a question that will come up on the Hill.  Disbud or not.  Because there is such a lot of ROOM for them there,  they  may be left with their natural horns.  We'll see.

But Mo…horns as a defense…NOT.  No Goat is able to defend against a predator successfully.  Horned or not.  The predator will take them down.  Goats are prey animals.

but anyway…this basket…all these scurs…these really represent for me Fear.  12 Fears.  The anxiety in needing to deal with a horn that is turning in to a Goats skull,  knowing that it could cause great pain and then death,  knowing how they would not understand the procedure that would prevent that…just has been so anxiety ridden for me.   So…a basket of Fears.  This last time…what 2 days ago,  i finally was ok with it.  I trusted the Vet.  I knew he could do it…use that bone saw and cut it at the correct place that would not cause harm.  

 

Books.  packed.  changed and packed.  Things are very different tonight.