windthread

I've stolen two things in my life so far.   That Crow,  on the altar behind me,  and this shirt i have on in this pic.  This is the first time i've worn it.  Both are stolen from my brother.   The Crow,  i've told the story here before a few times.  This shirt…

a couple or a few years before i left NM my brother and his youngest son Eli took a road/rail trip to visit.   Brother was looking for something in his back pack and took out this shirt along with other things and threw aside,  i was riveted ….I asked him if i could have it and he said no…they'd found it at a thrift shop along the way i forget which state…they coming from Minnesota,  so i said i'll trade you.  Anything i have.   He said no.   in the next hours,  they were tired,  i hung it over the back of old Cowboy's chair at the table…same chair that is at this table here now,  the old black one of Old Cowboy's Mom's,  and in the morning when they were still sleeping i put something else over the top of it.   They forgot about it as the days of their visit went on…it sat there under the thing over it.   Day came for them to leave and they packed up,  i didn't say a word and they left.   Since then,  it's hung in the closet.  First in NM and then here.  Just hung there.  This morning i took it off the hanger and came over to the Morning Table and slowly and deliberately cut the collar off.  Put it on.   it's rayon,  a size large men's.  just how i like them.  Drape.  Lots of it.  The color of Orange/Red…the Red i can love wholeheartedly along with scab Red,  and the designs on it,  i love,  just love and swirl in the looking at….so i put it on.   I messaged Alyssia…the book…Sensitive Chaos,  Theodore Schwenk…somewhere in the books she has at her place,  can she find it for me and bring?   It's my Chaos shirt.  Am not sure what that means.  I'll find out.

i might become a podcast junkie.   Beginning with this one…rumblestripvermont.com   her post on Turning 50  and the song Total Eclipse of the Heart…..i love it.  LOVE LOVE……she loves words and how they go together like…out to pasture, don't go near the waterfront,  the 50's being the puberty of Life,  crossing the rubicon of relevance and she Wonders about ambition…ambitionless drive…to produce for other people,  the continuity of ambition to NO ambition…a next one is about the Museum of Everyday Things….the year's focus on Knots.  There is a hair display.   i will turn 75 in a few months.  75.  think of that.