windthread

it has been dream~like.  almost some altered state,  but that's too dramatic.    Dreamlike.  I've spent the last days just looking.  Sitting on some hill side somewhere here,  several SomeWheres here,   just looking Out.   Most of the time the Goats are there,  some distance away and for them too,  there seems to be a quality of dream,  an aimlessness,  a drifting.    I woke from my "information gathering nap" yesterday,  mid day,  and just lie there.       Looking out the open door into the green green Green sun drenched world to the clear thought:   I am just so glad to be alive

Some of this arises from the leave taking of Just Going;  her imminent going,   her actual going and then the changed reality of her being gone.   The empty space where she lived.  

Then there came the vaccine.    The anticipation and then the reality of it.  Both these things….i notice that only in retrospect  do i have a real sense of how they have affected things,  changed things,  me.   Then,  no laptop.  and Rain stopped.  Stopped too soon.    I have turned mySelf in the opposite direction on the couchbed for sleep. My head is now to the South.   Today i chose scraps and wonder if i have forgotten how to let my mind loose enough to see the Invocations?

Marti sent an emailL   the Guardian.   Life and Style.   Stevie Trujillo.  entitled:  Off-road,  off grid:  the Modern Nomads wandering America's back country.    a review of the film   Nomadland  so this too became on my mind.  How Peggy McG and i watched all those Bob Wells Utube videos over years.  How she's Out There now,  How i am here.   I am going to figure out a way to meet her in Quartzsite SomeTime.   The thought of this brings tears of love to my eyes and to my heart.