windthread

i woke,   thinking about  Guppies.   Where did that come from?????    But i went on with the usual routine of waking….on the internet to see if the world is still here in some familiar form and Tea and then the 20 minute ReSleep,  ReSet but it was still Guppies.    I read this,  Marti's response to Dee's post…. from Joy Harjo's new book..Poet Warrior

"We are all here to serve each other.  At some point we have to understand that we do not need to carry a story that is unbearable.  We can observe the story,  which is mental;  feel the story, which is physical;  let go the story, which is emotional;  then forgive the story,  which is spiritual,  after which we use the materials to build a house of knowledge."

the day proceeded surprisingly intent on unfolding a very large and long story of scenes in my life.  that seemed disparate but were Not,  simply offering the reality of the complexity of   a lifeTime (  including Guppies).   Mid  afternoon,  i took this Cloth and those two stones with me to give water at B.  No known reason.  Just took them.   I set the hose for the flowering People and checked the Janet Chair.    …..   ok,    for this.    Set the Cloth and stones and stood looking,   to see    just on the right,  maybe around 3 oclock a single very very small greyblue most likely breast feather.   Someone had come.

When my kids were little,  like toddlers into kindergarten,  off and on my Brother's then wife would bring their two children the same age,   to live with  us.  Jenny and her cousin Sarah  were tight.     I asked her,  the other day…..What did i used to do with you when you were Emrie's age?    Her response was….Nothing much.  You had installed all those baby gates.  We lived in the dining room.  You threw food to us now and then.  We had eachother.          Which was so so much a Jenny reply.  So her.  So ungiving,   ongoing into this day when we live here on this Hill in California,  all still in our own cacoons,  coming out now and then but going back in,  to    "finish"…….but what she got wrong was……how they would say it.  Not….each other,  but

Ourchothers.   When i point this out,  she softens…a smile.  yes.  TheirChothers.

both of them said it that way.   Ourchothers.    it wasn't   Each   Other   but    Ourchothers.   They needed things,  for their chothers that day they decided to run away.   Dragging a dresser drawer up the street to the corner where there was a great stump of a tree,  where they set up housekeeping.   The bag of graham crackers and apricots….food for their Chothers.

and somehow all this.   I Utubed Guppies and found Dexter's World.   How to produce Thousands of different varieties of Guppies.   I LOVE.   Love Dexter.   i think he is in the Philippines?  I LOVE Dexter.   sent her a link.   To this day,  she loves the sound of an aquarium water filter,   the glow of the small light.   the little world  there in.