windthread

always,  into the Questions.   

a Being.   i think of her as She but feel her to be genderless,  and also, there's  less and less any leaning  toward  anthropomorphism  as days go by.  Mostly because the primary aspect of her is   Fluidity.   She changes and morphs right before my eyes.  Sometimes i see leaves,  then they are feathers and then they are patterns and  sometimes flowing water.  She appears to have wings but then becomes some kind of creature,  perched on "vibrations".   i see a cicada and that Bee Queen.  there is fluttering or a kind of breathing.  A Being made of Breath.  There is also a bird with wing on her left side,  to the side of her moon head,  which is not really a moon.  And sometimes,  especially if i have my hat on or my hood up,  doing other things,  i sense her to be  off the Cloth and somewhere above my right eye…the size of a hawk.  Not flying,  just there.  All this….so far.

and the Cloth is brown.  not gray.  grey.   

a scrap Installation:  America

Jan,  just North of me here sent this handkerchief.   Linen and Tatting….so fine the threads of both.  Weightless.  She said:  "it got accidentally dyed…maybe you can do something with her?"

this is one of the most Beauty Full things i have ever seen.    and i thought how makers are forever making beauty full things,  trying to engage with Beauty,  to feel Beauty      

And then there is the Beauty that is self ocurring,   that makes  its Self   and  when we encounter this,  it startles us and feeds the drive to Make Beauty…as a response.   So….

Us,  our drive to make beauty    IS  Beauty,  caused by,  put into motion by the naturally occurring .  A tree,  a stone,  setting Sun, fallen branch marked by the lines of living things living…how plants will Mark cloth,  how that happened here,  accidentally.

i have some Interior Work i'd like to do during the last half of this Rain season,  before the Gardens begin again,  so especially now,  for this work,  this small sacred cloth will be Place to hold the things that will help me see.   

there was one more image where you could see her a little more clearly but i couldn't get it to load.  Maybe i'm not supposed to.  She is vibrating at a very high frequency.  

 "….everyone shall sit under their own vine and fig tree and no one shall make them afraid."

Poet and HandDancer,  Amanda Gorman,   wearing YELLOW,   said     "we assert……"

Dancing Trees of Sumba Indonesia     Daniel Kordan photographer

very early,  looking for something else,  found this.   Set it in the middle of the table.  Reason unknown.

later,  still looking for what i was looking for…a photograph of the Old Moon Gramma,   out in the storage bins at B.   Not there.  But what was,  was an old cigar box of Cray-Pas.  They are very used and some partially having acquired a melted form.  But instantly i could FEEL them,  how they are…..     I got a box of oil pastels for the kids at one point and they were ok.   I hadn't remembered having these Cray Pas  but probably wouldn't have given them to the kids anyway.    As i was walking back,  just gazing,  i saw something i have never seen before.   I saw how the   ~air~  that is around and touching everything is

Yellow

there is the earth and what grows from it,  then this space that touches ALL  up to the leaves and branches of the Trees and then above,  into the canopy and beyond,  the blue sky.   But what is close,  surrounding and enveloping,  that Air,  is   Yellow.  Just so soft ephemeral yellow,  but…yellow.   I stood and stared and stared.   As morning went into day the yellow disappeared but then just a while ago when i had fed the buck Goats and stood looking out,  as i do,   the Yellow had returned…its soft …what,  glow?,  No,  not glow,  but i can't think of what to call it yet.  Maybe aura?

but earlier in the afternoon i got 3 of the Inktense Pencils.   and i couldn't resist…a couple dots of the cray pas.   Making Yellow where it wasn't before.   My hand.  Putting Yellow on cloth.

the small vertical dots.   They are exquisite.   Just small but so much THERE…so critical to the whole.

color is still all off.  This is a Green place,  the undercloth…the Deb Lacativa is the most WonderFULL greeness that enlivens the green of all else.

i couldn't work on this in the last days.  I wanted to but couldn't.   The energy of whats happening was so much opposite….i couldn't.  I held it a lot.   Today,  i could.  Everything is Together.   I think about Biome….a large naturally occurring community of flora and fauna occupying a major habitat  e.g. forest or tundra     I thought about the biome that is a person,  full of experiences,  memories,  dreams,  imaginings ….a biome too,  in a certain way.

i'll keep trying  to photograph the true color…otherwise it makes less sense.   Maybe very early in the morning,  at dawn.

to occupy ourSelves,   we looked through two manila folders of Cloths  i've made.  Print outs of photographs.   it is surprising,  how many.   And the best part was that it was if seeing them for the first time,  made by someOne else.   I like them.  A lot.  I have feelings for them,   FEELINGS about making them.  What it was to me.   I'll think about this.

the words…..from a fiber figure/art doll i made.  Sydney and Talulah have it in Albuquerque.   I used to attach a "tag"  to them,  with words that arose as i made them.    That one,  a crescent moon with an old face.  I didn't find a print out of it.  Maybe i don't have one.  but i remember it perfectly.   

my dreams are changing.   Finally.   and last night,   i saw

Fireflies.

spent a lot of the dream telling people about this,  wanting the to see them too.  They didn't understand what i was talking about.