kept thinking that this face is too pretty. But, faces ARE pretty., as are Butterflies. So..i thought, ok, it's ok. and maybe ALL faces are pretty…in that, well, you know, sense of the word….maybe All faces are if there is just the eyes, two nostrils, a line for a mouth?
it's been almost a week i didn't make cloth. I looked. Every day. But i did not stitch, or even move pieces around. Even though i did not take the small scraps off the table, that for those days was a dining table, just moved them to the far side, moved the thread basket to the far side, i didn't work cloth. There was a
Pull.
Today i washed with my fingertips the pieces that had been sitting in a basket.
and hung them to dry on the back of the chair.
this one i left As Is. i wanted to see the comparison.
i fooled around with these faces.
And i kept thinking the words of Wendy's children.
Children.
"I did not know that I could build a life with what I love. The cloths taught me that. I love the cloths."
"Can you heal the good back into me? That is what I ask the cloths. And they always answer Yes."
And i think i will use some capital letters for this post. See how that feels. If it makes things clearer.
Terri left this morning and i went to work. Came home and took a deep nap. Waking, there it all was, or much of it. Just right there. Terri was a Great visitor, she is a Good Good Woman and has a gift for remembering. So much of my life is a blur. But when someone else remembers, i can see it all and remember too. Terri did this for me. It was/is a Fine Gift.
I need to go back. The same day i posted about Wendy Golden~Levetts book of Thank You, was the day Terri arrived and i had to leave it there. I need to go back to it. Now, even more.
The photograph at the bottom right. The sand tray.
Wendy is a Jungian Therapist. C. G. Jung. You could google that if you wanted to. In that Other Life that Terri remembered for me, I had spent some time studying the work of Jung. It was the life at the underpinnings of all else. Then came Art. Then came all manner of Metaphysics. A lot i'd forgotten. Terri remembered. But that's about later. Right now,
Active Imagination:
is a cognative methology that uses the imagination as an organ of understanding. Disciplines of Active Imagination are found within various philosophical, religious, and spiritual traditions. It is perhaps best known in the West today through C.G. Jung's emphasis on the therapeutic value of this activity. Wikipedia
Sandplay:
Sandplay is hands on psychological work. It is a powerful therapeutic technique that facilitates the psyche's natural capacity for healing. In a "free and protected" space provided by the analyst, a client creates a concrete manifestation of his or her imaginal world using sand, water, and miniature objects. In this way Sandplay helps honor and illuminate the client's internal symbolic world and provides a place for its expression within a safe container, a tray filled with sand. from Googling Sandplay….C.G. Jung Institute of Los Angeles
In the midst of all this, the May 12 issue of The Nation came into my mailbox. Front Cover:
CLIMATE REVOLUTION
The cover article, Mark Hertsgaard, entitled Everyone's Climate
So, here we have a lot of Stuff. A lot of grist for the mill. And i want to go slow with it because there is too much synchronicity.
Yesterday was Alz B's Birthday Party at the Old Folks Home. Terri and i went. Not so many people came as last year. But we had good artisan pizza, carrot cake and butter pecan icecream. It's part of all of the above too. Sang a couple hearty renditions of Happy Birthday. Other things stand out. But i want to just leave them hanging in mid air for time being.
and just to say….I love you ALL, very very much, for being on the other end of these posts. And now, i better know why.
Love….
Alligator Juniper
Terri
and i love this pic of me. it appears that i have a butt!, which i don't. but it is an Illusion and i love it.
we went on to Magdalena. at Stella's Rock Shop i got this. almost for Nothing. He liked us.
i want to put these here this morning. they say a storm is coming. and i really needed them to be here, in case Electric goes out. i will come back later to put some words if i can, but if not, Jude has words over at the MotherShip…Spirit Cloth….
There are so many things to say, but really, the words here and All the words in the book tell the story so much better. The books arrival came as a complete surprise. I couldn't believe my eyes. i read and read and read the childrens words, went back and read them again. and continue to. Many times a day. the images and the words come at a particularly vulnerable time for me and though i have known of the Strength of these children for a few years, to see it before me like this is such an affirmation of the Beauty of humankind, the great capacity of creating one's own story to heal. Wendy uses the words "rugged determination in creating a meaningful life". Rugged Determination.
only that first page is of Wendy's voice. All the rest, words of the children. and as i continue to read, i am so struck by how they took their Places among us, the Makers, and found such strength of vision, strength of their own stories. how they Worked.
So beauty Full. so full of Heart and such a gift to Us, encouraging Us to believe in Ourselves, in Basic Goodness, and in the simple work of Making.
after i wrote the words
i went out. as i do. to the Goats. i go around. saying their names, kind of singing. i don't have pics of that because it's just me and Them.
tonight, i sing/say Celia's name and she stops. she Allows. and i scratch her. Fully. BIG NIGHT.
BIG NIGHT for Celia. she is forgiving me. for taking her Away from her mother when i was milking.
Forgiving me. she allows scratching. Everywhere. She stands. allowing.
and i try with Karma. with Just Going, with Arctica. no. they don't. for their reasons. so…ok.
but i go out and Try. and i am full of Goat Stuff. Their Ways….that i don't fully understand.
i left Early following up on a FreeCycle post of plywood, garden bricks, pvc pipe, two solid wood doors and more. when i called last night, they said yes. and Lumber. it was the LUMBER that got me. well…as it goes what is Lumber to one is scrap wood to another, but still, some good stuff. only one of the doors is solid. but that's ok because it's a good door. and some metal Tposts, fence posts, and yes, some plywood. bits and pieces. i am learning to look at Goat materials like i look at cloth scraps…some here, some there and you've got a whole Thing. i'll take pics tomorrow or Friday when i unload it. because i will have HELP, maybe, ? my friend Terri is coming on her way back from vacationing in Arizona tomorrow eve. she'll be here till Monday am. so…if she's Fit, i will put her to work. She's a lot younger than i am. Haven't seen her in over 20 years. Terri is from my Other Life, in Michigan. the Other Me that lived that life.
and the FreeCycle house was down the road from my Friends, Mike and Thelma and what Was their Native Plant Nursery till they gave it up a couple years ago. so i stopped there on the way out and as we do, they asked what was happening, and i tried not to say anything about it, but as i am, i did and told them about the Goat thing with neighbor. and as most people do, Mike offered some humorous comments which i'm used to, but because i really like them and know them to some good degree, i almost started to cry. Which is NOT me. Not at ALL the me they know, and it was uncomfortable, but Mike went to find some rope to tie down my FreeCycle load so it wouldn't fly off on the freeway and Thelma…being
a WOMAN and i continued the conversation and she wasn't able to offer any solution of course, but she didn't try, either. she just looked up at the sky, over at some trees, down to her feet and into my face. just hugged me. and off i went.
came home to do some more HouseKeeping and then to think more about faces.
the simplist one of all on this little terracota vase thing
the most complex. Green Tara, a buddhist Diety
a drawing of me that my son did when he was 7. with 3 rabbits in my hair
the Megamendung Goat Protectress
sometimes people keep their faces like this. keep themSelves like this. i guess because it's easier?
His Holiness, the Dalai Lama
and this man. John Wires. Cynthia had emailed a link to East Hill Tree Farm in Plainfield, Vermont. Looking at their bare root offerings and scrolling down, there suddenly was This face.
What an incredibly Beautiful Face and i was taken, completely, with wishing i could sit with him, just talk. Let the talk go anywhere at all and not end until everything that wanted to be said, had been.
WIND went home. back to behind the Rim. not till this afternoon, but finally and there is a huge sense of Relief. Palpable.
the roof repair completed same time as Wind's departure. my world is my own again. Relief. Palpable.
and i needed. NEEDED to surface from under all the DUST. we remember, the word Polvadera, where i live, that word translates to Nothing but dust. or, Place of dust. and so it is. and dust, meaning the finest of sand particle…again, as i have said before, more similar to those pics of allergens…little spikey pronged molecules….these tiny molecules cling unto one another like velcro unto velcro….and there was a LAYER of them.
it's still messy. but the craziness of WIND creates a sense almost of paralysis. tomorrow, i'll undo the messiness. today, i vacuumed Dust.
and early i rearranged the seed starting arrangement. took out an entire shelf. shifted the bricks. i liked how the Starts that have remained Inside, are looking Outside. soon, it'll be time for them to go Out too.
and inbetween all this, i looked at the little drawn faces that are in that basket on the Altar.
This one in particular.
sometimes, when we have certain things to work with, not a lot is needed. just small things can be very much enough and sometimes very much even MORE.
When Maria (aka 2) sent me my hundertwasser bracelet, she also sent some silk thread. the Green above is that thread. Tying it into a tassel was an experience. So Light it was almost not even there. and the color of Green….so exactly the color of Growing Things. Garden Green. Gaia Green. Earth Green.
so that and Deb L's thread…..
the deep satisfaction of stitching this small cloth thing. it surprised me, really. i want to Make more small simple things. They feel very very good.
(the heart stone covers one of the things just for Martine)
