windthread

Thank YOU, Sandy      

so  much.    I didn't even know you had them all these years.   How Wonder FULL,   to see them again.   Love and Love…..and more Thank You.    

one of the very first ones,   like,  Very first ones

grass is grass

my long long long time Friend     Sandy     sent me these photographs of some of the fiber figures i made ….in the early days  of them…Book Store days,  Ann Arbor Michigan       I was surprised to see them,  to know she has them.   and wondered how they might be different after all the time with Jude Hill's teachings?    i'll continue to put them here for these last few days of over 100 degrees…..until we return to the 90's for a week  and i maybe find out why i am      how    i am………   Thank you, Sandy

• 
•  it's the one that lives next to me on my left.   on the bench here at the Table.   acts as a side table to hold the drawing board which holds the calendar,  sometimes the  drawing book,  and always that Life Basket we see here so often.   it lived in the spring st. house in Ann Arbor and drove with me in Fern,  the  1975   Ford Econoline van  to New Mexico.   And back.   and then back to New Mexico.   And then to California in a UHaul Truck.    
• the Threads.    are usually on the table in their own basket….just there,   to help me live.    they are not just thread   but Things to me.   They are butterflies,   flowers,   trees,  grasses of here and New Mexico,   they are the Rio Grande River,  the Rim of the World  there.    Lizards and praying mantis,  crows,  moths and human figures,   the    doings   of those human figures, and rocks and stones  and through it all,   FEELINGS   and the earth,  the earth ,  the earth upon which all those doings and feelings  play out.   They will come back to their own small basket on the Table where they can breathe.   Till Next  Time.
• One more thing about This Time.    That day we came back,  that they insisted we must,   Jenny left work early again and we met at Home Depot.    They'd taken their  measurments   and had a piece of delux plywood cut.   Brought all the needed tools and bateries from both homes,  the fence cutters etc and in the far parkinglot DID the repair of the floor.  My daughter.   My granddaughter.   Ample and Strong.   

and the Garden has died.   the days of no water,  100 plus temps.   i'm not ready to say anything more.   

this is second try….the "image proxy"  thing repeats.   so….                 goodnight

i didn't want to write any of this,  give it words.    But i think i  should.   Everything now will arise from this moment.  And things will be changed.

The first Watch Duty Alert came at 11 01am    ten acres grass and oak woodland,  moderate rate of spread   by  11 p,  3000 plus.  Both able bodied males had left that morning to go visiting…Phoenix and New Mex.    It was the four of us.   Jenny, Alyssia,  Emrie and Me.   Jenny was coming from work.  A   E   and me were to get Goats into the corridor of the Curry House.   j and A struggled to pull the "goat boat" forward  from where it had been blocked for 3 years.   They  finally did.   The loading,  one by one with Tay's long horse lead and a lot of coaxing went as smoothly as could be,  considering.  We rolled down the driveway down stopping at Jack's to open his gate,  open the door to the feed shed there.   Wish him well with pained hearts.  Emrie had questions.   We drove toward Gridley…the fairgrounds   were on a 45mph stretch of highway just out of town   Alyssia first with the Goats,  Jenny next,  me and minnow.  Puppy in a carrier with Alyssia,  her 2 dogs and her cat.   jenny braked hard and veered to the right.   

i saw a white form coming out of the trailer    hit the pavement    bounce    hit the pavement again  then roll to the side of the road.    It got up.  Stood a second then took off down the steep embankment.   It was Onday.  Jenny came running and i was running along the top of the embankment calling to her   Onday,  Onday….she ran    A young woman ,  Alyssia's age and Energy came running as did a man from a truck.   She yelled to Jenny to GO,  help with the trailer,  she would do this and she ran down the embankment,  as did the man       she ran behind Onday till she suddenly stopped and i said jump!  she'll let you hold her and she did and i threw the Tay lead down to the man who put it on her.   They made their way up and the young woman said we'll put her in your minivan.   Ok and we did and  i said something like….i cannot say,   and she said she had had Goats and turned and left.   

a couple weeks ago Jenny and her man did the CHECK on the trailer…tires,  lights,    Jenny's  new divider gate to keep some first loaded from the rest if needed.   Into that part we'd put Onday,  LuckyStar ,  the old ones and Celia who has a chronic bum leg.  i am known as someone who engages in catastrophic thinking.   Which might be true,  but also might not.   I try to work with it.  I let them do the readyness check.  Did not question.  Trusted.   Did it occur to any of us to check the entire floor?   No.  and that single small part at the right corner  of the front….went through.

within some moments Celia who had also fallen out was loaded in Jenny's car and Lucky Star was squashed with all the others in the back.  Now standing room only.  We drive.   to the fairgrounds in Gridley which was           enpty and quiet.   Error.  so we turned went back and drove to Camelot arriving well into the dark were everything was different  but got signed in and the Goats unloaded and they made it clear,  time for us go go away.  They asked as i filled out the papers with names of each and gender,  if any were injured and  i  said probably so they put Onday and Celia together.    I got a call early next morning from the Vet who was there,  the same really great and wonderful Vet,  Sarah Lynn,  of all other evacuations  who remembered them,  remembered us.  She said she had checked Celia's leg fully and it appeared to be maybe arthritis or something similar and she had prescribed  Meloxicam which they were starting.   that we should ask for remaining pills when we left and then call her and she would continue to prescribe on going.   I said….but Onday,  Onday??????   she said with the exception of a few scrapes,  Onday was

fine.

Snowbunny was jenny's first Goat.     Onday and her two brothers Iko and Iko were the first kidding.   I named them.  Nancy…go to UTube and listen to Iko Iko  Dixie Cups

This has turned my whole world around.   I close my eyes and see it over and over,  her falling, bouncing,  falling bouncing on the pavement

yesterday i wasn't sure.    …Was for the first time ever,    Depleted.   Mentally and physically.  Completely.  Depleted.  But today,  if i am going to live,  i will need to eat.    and it is the perfect and ONLY time to clean the refrigerator.   I DID.    scrubbed,   sat,  drink water,  breathe.  scrub.   repeat   over and over all day.   Slow going,  but happening.   and done.   Tomorrow ice can come.  Food can come.        For now,  it's totally empty,  all bagged for trash,  all condiments,  all my little jars of dipping recipes,  my beautiful big bottle of Sriracha.     Begin again.

we are back.   all day phone didn't work…too hot.   Phone people said they were trying  to take care of it.   and same,  the lap top. Need to learn this kind of heat….thought i'd do better with it…not so far   and the 100 plus will continue on.   Things here might be intermittent.      

Love and Love to All of Us