windthread

recent posts

about

risk

Thunder Man is moving.  lightening.  but if i don't get this down here in the moment, it will be lost.  One way or the other.

Deb G provided the key.  in the last comment  that loosened the whole thing.  an innocent comment but it was what was needed.003
the heat has broken.  like a fever.

004
i went out with the flash light to see what they were doing.  they are in the Albatross.  they are concerned.

009
the house, from where they can see.

ok.  this is risky business.  Thunder/Lightning is still overhead.  but i need to get this down.  if i would wait till morning, it wouldn't be the same.

Deb G commented and loosened it all.  i understand more.  re: that pic of 19 me.  what is was/is.

it's Willingness.  Willingness without Knowing.  Total Willingness, simply based upon the moment.  Clean.  Clear.

so much has happened since that single moment when someone snapped that pic.  experiences.  some good some not so much.  but the truth that remains within it all is that

I cannot keep stuff safe.  OR, just, I cannot keep anything.  i can just go.

in the moment of that pic, i was without past or future.  i was just there.  pure.  clean.  simple.

and this is where i am finding self again now.  just there.  just going.  it sort of is something about trust.  but more that that, really, a kind of Willingness.  a Willingness for Whatever.  who knows?

and here we are again, the Jude Thing, supposedly about cloth, but really, about Everything,

it's Just Going.

So.  ok.  it is a beautiful totally perfect New Mexico night.  the sky is illuminated by Storm.  Earlier, dragonflies filled the air.  FILLED the air.  the hose ran into the tree wells and toads came.  a spider came to drink.  i watched a spider drink.  and i am RElearning the truth that i cannot keep anything at all safe.  i cannot keep anything at all Right.  i need to just go. 

Thank You, Deb G.  Thank you and big big love………

 

Posted in

34 responses to “risk”

  1. Michelle in NYC Avatar
    Michelle in NYC

    Ah…….it’s like standing next to you sometimes……like being there. yes. Had to go back and read the comments in that last post again…..and Deb G.’s…how different we are than ever we were….and you seeing yourself clear and available like that……yes. The lightning that had the goats concerned…..looking back at the lights of your little home…..and seeing you watching a spider drink…..yes…..available to it all despite the risk……and unable to keep anything..but not unable to express those flashes of insight, the daily wonder of it all and just going on…..hand in hand Grace….hand in hand…..under the blanket of stars woven above us…..the same stars……and this moon of the full we share…..yes. It is all good.

    Like

    Reply
  2. Elizabeth Avatar
    Elizabeth

    smelt the rain, felt the release of storm and mind, so easy and yet so rarely reached.

    Like

    Reply
  3. elizabeth fortes Avatar
    elizabeth fortes

    Dear Grace – From the midst of Arctic moisture I hear you! Willingness! Just going…Now!
    Being here, on the bridge that links past and future, quietly….. Just being. Tears flowing…
    A different Storm: 24hours of daylight.The permanence of light and the moisture of life…
    love,
    e.

    Like

    Reply
  4. Deb G Avatar
    Deb G

    Grace this is such a beautiful post. I’m not sure how “innocent” my comment was, it was just what I could sort out from all the thoughts that your previous post let loose for me. Are still running loose. love to you…

    Like

    Reply
  5. deanna7trees Avatar
    deanna7trees

    living in the moment…

    Like

    Reply
  6. grace Forrest Avatar
    grace Forrest

    yes, but something more or less or different, too….

    Like

    Reply
  7. nance Avatar
    nance

    i think of how naive i was… how trusting…
    still am.. yes, i know more… not as naive
    ….but still so trusting… sometimes wonder if its a good thing …
    but it is who i am still. there is a core that remains the same
    grace forrest… the things you bring up!!!
    xxxooo

    Like

    Reply
  8. Mo Crow Avatar
    Mo Crow

    the Moon over there is the same peeking through the clouds Full Moon here, a Capricorn goatish sort of moon, a journey moon, they say that Capricorn is the diligent realist but look at the creature a goat head with a fishy tale! This moon feels like a leaping off the edge just for the joy of it, knowing she can nimbly put one tiny hoof down and stand en point on the edge and look down into the abyss and up at the stars!

    Like

    Reply
  9. Mo Crow Avatar
    Mo Crow

    oh & here’s Capricorn from my Zodiac series from back at the turn of the century
    http://www.bluecatheaven.com.au/Mos%20art/CelestialTimes/capricorn.html

    Like

    Reply
  10. judykeathley@cox.net Avatar
    judykeathley@cox.net

    risk.
    thank you, grace.

    Like

    Reply
  11. grace Forrest Avatar
    grace Forrest

    thanks for saying that…standing next to me..i like that a lot. so i picture you here. sometimes comment to you as i move around. nice. really really nice.

    Like

    Reply
  12. grace Forrest Avatar
    grace Forrest

    yes…that release. cannot be created or even desired.
    just happens, of it’s own accord….

    Like

    Reply
  13. grace Forrest Avatar
    grace Forrest

    elizabeth~ the permanence of light…yes…for me would
    give no reprieve
    moisture
    and i think of the word seep

    Like

    Reply
  14. grace Forrest Avatar
    grace Forrest

    Deb…

    Like

    Reply
  15. grace Forrest Avatar
    grace Forrest

    i am trusting in a very different way….trusting not so
    much my own creations but rather that it all will go as
    it goes. trusting the continuing of things.

    Like

    Reply
  16. grace Forrest Avatar
    grace Forrest

    their hooves are really elegant

    Like

    Reply
  17. grace Forrest Avatar
    grace Forrest

    it’s a wonder Full word, isn’t it.?.
    differing meanings to each of us….

    Like

    Reply
  18. dee Avatar
    dee

    you are stripping down to the bones, it seems… and still dancing.

    Like

    Reply
  19. Mo Crow Avatar
    Mo Crow

    they dance with such grace & BTW that was meant to be “en pointe” scatty as all get out today…

    Like

    Reply
  20. Doris Avatar
    Doris

    trusting the continuing of things …
    Thank you for these words.That´s what I feel sometimes.
    I ask myself what is left of the 19 years old me ( and you) isn´t it something essential which will stay till 90?
    When as a teacher I worked with with 10 years old children, I always thought that the character is formed and will stay , you can see it from a distance not when you yourself are struggeling with your life.
    Today I take it as a good sighn there is a good continuance and willingness is still there.
    I´m still sitting here in hot Paris and I´m ready to go home soon with my fullfilled dream. Here I have found some feelings which I have left here with 19. It´s like a circle thats round now. Good feeling.

    Like

    Reply
  21. nance Avatar
    nance

    not so different… i wasn’t talking about art… unless its the art of life.

    Like

    Reply
  22. saskia Avatar
    saskia

    hey, we’re born naked, muddle about a bit and then die naked; the muddling part is probably the most interesting part, not entirely naked, first gathering as much as I can, stuff, knowledge, people and then the realisation: let go, let it all go and keep on going, ouch and bliss and tears and laughter and oh to be 19 again and know all this, wow that would probably blow my mind……
    I don’t know if I have an ‘essence’, I don’t know if it matters, I’m here at my desk in my studio typing this, breathing and feeling, feeing a painful happiness and willingness to share….
    thanks Grace for this particular post

    Like

    Reply
  23. grace Forrest Avatar
    grace Forrest

    i’m not talking about art/cloth either. by “creations”,
    i mean thought forms. ascribing one meaning or another to things,
    wanting to fit any moment or period of time into
    something familiar or known*. instead of just letting
    things stand alone. something like that.
    *or even previously imagined…

    Like

    Reply
  24. grace Forrest Avatar
    grace Forrest

    i don’t know

    Like

    Reply
  25. grace Forrest Avatar
    grace Forrest

    i think my most basic self is from when i was 7 years old.
    i think i have circled away, trying on many different
    variations of that through life, adding to, taking away, and maybe at a few certain points just pausing…like
    this 19. and maybe i am doing that again now, or
    coming into it.

    Like

    Reply
  26. grace Forrest Avatar
    grace Forrest

    i like that you say you are sitting at your desk..it
    gives me a closer sense of your words.

    Like

    Reply
  27. nance Avatar
    nance

    well isn’t that what trusting implies? for me thats what trusting means… that it will be what it will be. first lesson in course of miracles actually.

    Like

    Reply
  28. dee Avatar
    dee

    something about being left behind?

    Like

    Reply
  29. Michelle in NYC Avatar
    Michelle in NYC

    Hey Grace
    I came by again ’cause I’m kinda missing the dialogue here, missing Jude a little too. We are in the third heatwave and it wearies me, though I’m doing okay with it thanks to my ability to escape back into my A/C abode and sleep in peace there. Sometimes I see the goats and you in my minds eye as I drift off. That’s all really. Just sending a bit of love wind. I’m going to check in to the CB3 forum now and see if there are any new developments there before shutting down for the night. It’s almost 1AM Friday for goodness sake.

    Like

    Reply
  30. Michelle in NYC Avatar
    Michelle in NYC

    Oooops—I meant CB2–maybe I’m projecting a wish into the future. Ha!

    Like

    Reply
  31. Jennie Avatar
    Jennie

    Grace, on 7/2 you said that a comment from Deb G had “provided the key” to your feeling brought up by the photo of you @ 18 or 20…
    have searched every batch of comments from that posting and 2 before and cannot find Deb’s original thought.
    Please enlighten me; it seems profoundly important.
    Jennie

    Like

    Reply
  32. grace Forrest Avatar
    grace Forrest

    hey, Jennie…she said: “nineteen….How different life is than I thought it would be at that time…not bad just
    different”
    and as i said in the response of the post Risk, it was
    a comment that seemed “innocent”…she didn’t really
    say anything directly….but for some reason, her words
    just…LOOSENED…my sense of it. I am still very much
    thinking about it all and the occurances of the last days
    only add to it. It was not so much really what she said,
    but what it clicked in me…i saw that in the moment of
    that photograph, i had absolutely no idea WHAT i thought
    life might be. but i was ok with it. i was ok with that
    vagueness. that sense of Who Knows. in that moment of
    that pic, there was very little Ego happening. maybe that’s
    it?, i still really don’t know it all. just glimmers.
    BUT, i think that’s the beauty of this exchange on a blog.
    we put stuff. people have responses. it is very beautiful
    to me…
    sometimes we have similar feelings, sometimes not. but i
    learn from all of it.
    it helps me with a view of what my words “say”.
    I am in a mood this evening due to a lot of things. but
    even just this query of yours, i love, because you cared
    enough to really wonder and i sense that you are wondering
    from somewhere inside you, about your own Experience of this Life.
    so…xoxox

    Like

    Reply
  33. grace Forrest Avatar
    grace Forrest

    dee..hmmmm, i don’t think so, but i am not sure what you
    mean?

    Like

    Reply
  34. grace Forrest Avatar
    grace Forrest

    Michelle, (in my mind, i call you Chelle) (shell)…
    so, Shell, yes. it’s kind of a limbo, isn’t it. Odd.
    and things are happening here that i am not up to writing about tonight. maybe tomorrow. but yes. it’s so
    different without Spirit Cloth. I am stitching away
    at a “housecoat”. am very into it. hopefully, tomorrow
    will allow some time for pics????? don’t know. But, love to you and i smile that it’s 1AM for goodness sake. because that’s what it is, Goodness Sake. xoxo

    Like

    Reply

Leave a reply to Mo Crow Cancel reply