windthread

recent posts

about

75

i have gone back and tried to find Minka's comment that i'm referring to and can't and that's a BIG lesson in making notes of things.  anyway, Minka….correct me if i'm really off:  the comment was nothing huge, but a simple statement about nearing retiring and having always had people "say" she is an artist, and just now, thinking she needs to think of herself  in that way.  Minka:…right?

and it was a neon comment because that has been very much on my mind all along with this commitment to document for 365 days, and then now looking at how it's already into the 70's, this year's days and it seems like the Writing is on the Wall.

and then, she commented with the link , on Day 72,  the link to NPR Terry Gross interview with Claire Messud, the author of The Woman Upstairs. A saga of
Anger and Thwarted Ambition.    many things in that interview….but i only got so far today.  this is going to go on for a while i think.  the author is talking about "sacrificing everything for your art"…and Gross is at first interested in how the novel is "fueled by anger…"  and Messud's response is that she feels it's about "the interior life.  the relation of the interior life to exterior reality.  she goes on that "we all have interior lives that don't break the surface."  and goes on to describe her love of one of Chekhov's stories, a character who said "what is most important to me nobody knows about"  it is invisible …then has the revelation that that's true for everybod. around him also.  All of us are walking around with what is most important to us unseen.

Messud says of her protagonist that she does some art, but she doesn't think of herself as an artist.  and goes on to say "many of us set out thinking there will be a time in the future, and then suddenly we find ourselves at a moment when we have to acknowledge that the future isn't infinate.

all the above is misquoted and maybe even paraphrased a little….Please forgive that.  you can go to the interview and read it correctly.

but what has me about all this is exactly where i began.  how i was thinking 74 days ago about what a large part the "Unforseen" seemed to play in my days.  and how i wanted to understand that more, to "partner up with the Unforseen"…which means…Accepting it as just How It Is.  

but now, i'm thinking again.  Wanting to understand More.   i guess the idea was on Day l was that i might learn something and even MAKE SOME CHANGES.  but i need to see the big picture.  this above brings me closer.  

And it is a real response to Minka's words.  She is thinking of BEING an artist.  to Herself.  and i guess i want to talk about that some.  

Gross says "part of the novel is about how selfish and self-absorbed do you have to be in order to be an artist and what license does being an artist give you to be selfish and self-absorbed, because if your art comes first, what are you sacrificing for your art, other people, your relationship to them?

and then a little while later Messud says  "i don't think its ever figured out, i think it's a balance that anyone is negotiating and renegotiating throughout a life".     WHA AND ACK.

I DIDN'T WANT HER TO SAY THAT.  i didn't.  but i have ordered the book.  i am looking for some steppingstones across the river.  i "retired" going on 6 years ago.  and retired to me means something very different i think than to Minka.  but i don't want to get stuck in detail, in minutia.  it's the IDEA of it.  i thought i was going to become the me that i had been waiting for.  At that time, i was still thinking i was going to be a

writer.

write just one single book.  guess what the name of that book was?….The Care and Feeding of the Private Self.  as Jude would say…Ha.

jump to the chase.  when i realized that didn't know what that meant,  i gave it up.  there was a big Blank Space.  then, i found SpiritCloth…i began making Cloths and i DO know what that means.  to me, cloth making IS art.  and even though i have a Lot to Learn, the question is, then, do I consider myself to be an artist?  do I sacrifice for my effort to make art?  is that necessary?  can i be satisfied with compromise?, as i have been all along so far ….OR….am i at that point….of acknowledging that the future is Very Finite….it's just around the corner.

and this is what i did today after i cleaned Allen's house:

IMG_5884f

i reconfigured a dress for Alz B.  she is inclined to take Off her shirts and that is not ok at the Old Folks Home.  so they were wondering if long dresses might make it harder to get naked.   this took a while.

IMG_5883f

and i added ONE SINGLE SCRAP to this cloth that i

love.

Day 75..

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Posted in

53 responses to “75”

  1. Nance Avatar
    Nance

    What a lot of thinking, grace. Thank you. You sort things out. Not just the tools in the albatross. Care and feeding type of things. Such big heavy questions that seem to have been around for a long time for me and still are not answered. The answers are always just around the corner.when the kids get older. Whei get my degree. When we stop moving around for the job. When the kids get out of college. When I finish this last volunteer project. When I get off the board. When I get my hip replaced. Then… What? There will always be a when…. So I think for myself anyway, that life and art is happening all the time while we are waiting . We just do it… Just keep going like jude and you are always saying. It’s true. You just go and do the best you can at the moment. I don’t think there is any more than that. There is always something that we give up no matter which thing we choose. So we just keep going. It’s the best answer I have ever found.

    Like

    Reply
  2. grace Forrest Avatar
    grace Forrest

    Nance…i read your words, then went back and read the words i wrote
    and what popped out this time was
    the me i had been waiting for
    and yes. oh yes, yes. “Life and Art is happening all the time while we are waiting.”
    and yes. i think of Jude. i think of Judy Martin, now…in her
    current self. i think of Mo. i think of…who else?…..well, them for the moment. and i look at what they DO. it’s
    a LOT.
    there is a commitment there and they DO a lot. i look at their body of work. it’s a Lot.
    and although there’s no Anger anymore, because the only true object
    of my anger is myself, the only true object of my , uhhhhh, question, is Also my self. i want to do More. because i know i
    can. i’d like to see what that looks like.

    Like

    Reply
  3. Nance Avatar
    Nance

    Yes grace you can do more. We can do more. Some always do more than others. If I compare, I always fall short.

    Like

    Reply
  4. grace Forrest Avatar
    grace Forrest

    well…
    i still
    want to see
    FOR MYSELF
    what it might look like.
    not a comparison, but what would I look like to me?????
    what might that feel like? to be
    devoted? i’d like to know. how it FEELS.

    Like

    Reply
  5. Jan Avatar
    Jan

    grace, we come here to see what that looks and feels like for you yourself. how it takes form. through you.
    I heard that interview with Claire Messud as well and was glad she said the thing about it always being a negotiation to attend to our art. it keeps life real, I think. and keeps our art real.
    it seems you are exploring your own book through what you do here. blessings for that. to keep going.

    Like

    Reply
  6. Nance Avatar
    Nance

    Yes, I see. Was not saying you were comparing…. More of myself thinking out loud. I feel devoted. I do what I can do. But others can do more… Does that make me less devoted? This Is a rabbit hole I can not pursue too often without self doubts. My nature, I suppose… Or my conditioning! Ha!

    Like

    Reply
  7. Marti Avatar
    Marti

    Ever since I have known you, you have put your all into whatever was your passion at the time, even with your responsibilities. When have you not felt devoted?
    And I am glad that you said no comparison because really, why even bring it up? I’m sure that the women that you listed had many responsibilities that also took up their time yet they continued, just like you do, and I can only feel that their passion for what they were doing, over road any obstacles. From my perspective, it is not about quantity but about quality and yes, I know that this is a cliche but it is how I feel about what you do with cloth. Given all that makes up your life, your special care giving, the work outside of your home, your goats, you still have made many beautiful, varied and soul filled cloths.
    From doll making to writing to Cloth, it is all an evolution, flowing through time, through the stages of your life, as if one had to happen before the next.
    Before I end this road ramble, there is that scrap of cloth that speaks to me of fingers on a hand, holding that cloth circle of possibilities. It could be that the hand is gentling the cloth, reassuring it but what I feel is that the hand is marking this cloth as your cloth. Is this an altar cloth because it feels so strongly that it should be your cloth. This cloth simply vibrates, signifying that this is what you do, who you are and in so doing, there is no need to label yourself Artist because the cloth does that by leaving such an emotional impact. There you have my definition of art – something that moves me, connects with me…and now this road ramble is ended. Good night all.

    Like

    Reply
  8. Valerianna Avatar
    Valerianna

    Lots here… lots.
    I’m pondering this line…. “part of the novel is about how selfish and self-absorbed do you have to be in order to be an artist and what license does being an artist give you to be selfish and self-absorbed, because if your art comes first, what are you sacrificing for your art, other people, your relationship to them?”
    When we are committed and passionate about anything – gardening, cooking, being a teacher, doctor, lawyer – we need to learn to balance this passion with our relationships. I’m always somewhat confused about why when artists go headlong into their work they are seen as self-absorbed and selfish. OK, so they are defining their own perameters, working within their story/vision, but heck, so did Einstien. There are famous stories of people in ALL disciplines who go over the edge in terms of self-absorption. Seems to me that because culture doesn’t value art as much as science, that a scientist’s research is seen as something that benefits the culture, whereas an artist’s research is seen as selfish and self-absorbed.
    Just pondering this… lots more could be said.
    In re-reading he quote, I see a different implication. But I would still say much of what I did above.. that, yes, lots of negotiating must take place with an artistic live, just as in any life full of passionate persuits.
    Ok, novel here… I’m posting this cause I thought a lot about it, and now its kinda late, so I hope it makes sense and that I’m glad I pushed post tomorrow!

    Like

    Reply
  9. Michelle in NYC Avatar
    Michelle in NYC

    Nothing one does is not a creative act–the artists life is life itself. Constantine Stanislavski–(en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Constantin_Stanislavski)–the originator of method acting-said “My life is my art”–Sure I know what you mean when comparing yourself to artists like Judy, Jude and Mo–they have so much to show for their work, they are in some sense full time working artists. But that’s not anythin more than what their circumstances and passions led them to. Other artists have varied paths, paths that wander off in many directions and all of it is art. I’m naive, but for all the artists, yogis, gardeners, farmers, mothers, and you name it, I see nothing but art in each life…art in the kitchen, in the gallery, in the garden, in the daily tasks of arranging survival. Art in relationship and art in the solitary prayer, the stack of stones, the feather on the end of the stick, the flight of geese, the birth of goats, and babies, and ideas, and so….of course I think of you as an artist. Why wouldn’t I. Think of all those brilliant women quilters who gave it all away thinking only of the warmth of friends and family, and never got to see their masterpieces in the folk museum that inherited them long after those hands were gone on. Look how the bowl of lemons and limes on my kitchen windowsill shines like a Rembrandt against the brown stone, or stare in wonder at this blog you’ve made, and how it sometimes just explodes with feeling and image. Is that not art, and isn’t it devotion? It’s never more than be here now and do what can be done is it?–and isn’t this true–“Just stop for a minute and you’ll realize you’re happy just being. I think it’s the pursuit that screws up happiness.If we drop the pursuit, it’s right here.” James Hillman

    Like

    Reply
  10. Michelle in NYC Avatar
    Michelle in NYC

    If commerce would prove it–frame some of those gorgeous photographs–get the dolls out and mount them on stands, devise a way to show and sell like a separate blog and a contact me if you don’t want to get involved with pay pal You are gifted oh my dear one, and no one sees the way you do.

    Like

    Reply
  11. saskia Avatar
    saskia

    the phrase about the interior life never breaking the surface, oh my, yes I agree and no I don’t, because in looking at what you do and show and write about here is breaking the surface somewhat, revealing.
    and for me, what I show on my blog is revealing in ways I don’t even know.
    am reading a novel titled ‘Love’ at the moment (number 2 in the series of six books in total ‘My Struggle’) by KarlOve Knausgard a Norwegian author; his quest, as far as I can tell, is to write about his everyday life, all of it, his emotions his reactions his thoughts, how he tries to hind behind a mask at times, how he tries to please everybody…and on and on, and he describes how he sacrifices at times his girlfriend and their children by neglecting them in order to write…yes the compromise and yes I see and know this, oh so well…..torn between the family and my art, and all the rest of Life, a struggle at times…
    but worth it; there is no actual point to any of it (my personal view) but doing what you do with devotion and discipline and commitment, that is what makes it worthwhile, worth our while.

    Like

    Reply
  12. patricia Avatar
    patricia

    wonder full. this post of yours. feels like the result of sun passing through a magnifying glass. creating a single condensed point of light — so condensed it can burn–does BURN.

    Like

    Reply
  13. Julie Avatar
    Julie

    I am thinking of “and.” As in “I am an artist AND I do XX and XXX.” You do all kinds of XX and XX, as we see every single day in your blog–which, by the way, for me, is absolutely a book about the care and feeding of the private self. I watch you care for and feed yourself (which seems to involve caring for goats, old folks, homes,piles of screws and bolts,chili peppers, compost piles, and all the other bloggers who get the benefit of your EEEEEEEEs.) And in the watching, I learn about caring for My Self. Like watching Jude, I learn about My Cloth. So you are writing your book as you write your life.
    And apropos of the author interview, I once had an argument with Stepson the Music Composer when we were visiting Frank Lloyd Wright’s studio in Chicago. I mentioned what an appalling person FLW was, enticing and then trampling over the women in his life, turning his back on his children,viciously exploiting all the artists who came to work for him. Son was adamant that all that is ok because of what he created.Like artists should get a “get out of jail free” card.I think again, And. He was an artist AND he was a shit.
    And, and and.

    Like

    Reply
  14. lindamorris Avatar
    lindamorris

    I am so glad I came here, looking for EEEEEEEs and what grace has been up to. what a thought provoking conversation, love it and all the brilliant responses too,oh i love you guys all ! Grace it feels to me like you are for sure a Devoted being , maybe you would like to see a different balance and find more Time for your words and your cloth .More time for what you love what makes you happy. I was just the other day struck with something Jude said, in Stars and Moons and Suns class,speaking about being devoted to our art and passion , how some things do take a long time and “the question is, are we going to take the time to do it ? “

    Like

    Reply
  15. kat Avatar
    kat

    There are times when I think the title of artist can bring to bear burdens that it originally did not hold. This culture is still strugglng with the ideas of self and all it entails. Self care is shown to be important, but we still hear people putting it at the very end of the list, if ever on the list, because somehow, it seems to be a sacrifice, rather than necessity.
    I know we all, women especially, are creative. And I think that creativity is art, at the heart of art, therefore, we are all artists of some form or other. You have a creative approach to AlzB, to the old man and how you take care of him. You are creative in your care of the goats. And you create art when you rearrange the items in your yard – the picture of the copper-just yesterday, was it? is an artful creation.
    There are those whose mere preparation of a meal is art. And I’m not talking the sous chefs. I mean ordinary people, in the way they choose ingredients and prepare a meal and serve it to themselves or their families. It is art. Every task in life becomes art, if only we develop the eye to see it. And we can make those tasks mundane, or we can find creativity in them, and joy. And that makes what we are doing art.
    This art may never appear in a gallery or command massive amounts of money. How many “famous” artists lived their lives in poverty only to have their works treasured long after they were gone? This art lives in the life and soul of its creator, and those that are fortunate enough to observe it and really see it for what it is. I am grateful that I found you and Jude, and your circle. I get to see art every day.
    And at that, I’ll end this tome. Thank you.
    PS I really love how this cloth is developing. Loving the colors and shapes and particularly the little face peeking out at us.

    Like

    Reply
  16. Julie Avatar
    Julie

    How is it that This Place has no physical entity but I would rather be here than almost anywhere????

    Like

    Reply
  17. Dee Avatar
    Dee

    all of these comments enlarge the wondrous post above, but I have to say this is so, so lovely Michelle…

    Like

    Reply
  18. Dee Avatar
    Dee

    labeling oneself an ‘artist’ can be a burden, a superficial footnote, but it can also signal to one’s innermost being that you are taking your creativity seriously – giving it space and room to breathe, willing to nurture it and sacrifice to honor it.
    so, I’ve called myself an artist for awhile now.
    but, I’m not. More of a writer, really. So it was interesting to read that your initial or previous impulse was to write.
    Sometimes I think all this cloth stuff is a way to hide from what wants to be written. But what wants to be written keeps getting subverted by my caregiving responsibilities. How to wrangle with those, indeed?!
    lastly and most importantly, I want to echo in the most melodious and torso-thrumming way possibly – that your art is so palpable here, in your writing, your cloth, even in your caregiving! – and so nurturing to whomever shows up and so expansive and so wonderful in all the ways one expects a cathedral or a Rauschenberg or an Alvin Ailey performance to be….

    Like

    Reply
  19. Dee Avatar
    Dee

    and P.S. those caregiving responsibilities keep me away from here more than I like!!

    Like

    Reply
  20. Mo Crow Avatar
    Mo Crow

    what a great conversation, Grace! This new art form of writing our lives with words and pictures into the ether of Bloglandia is a huge part of your art making process and you do it with such a strong open voice straight from the heart with such beauty and grace. It’s in that sharing, in that opening up, in that stating of what is so bleeding obvious to you that makes Windthread real & makes it art.
    where else does the work come from but deep in your dreams…
    the day to day of your life…
    your sorrows…
    your joys…
    your fears…
    your anger…
    your wonder…
    your excitement…
    your pain…
    & you translate all this for us here with your diary…
    that’s art
    and what does the viewer of art want?
    a chunk of the artist’s heart and soul…
    & you give it to them…
    & that’s so cool! cause there’s always more…we all have huge deep hearts and plenty of soul & giving a bit away just makes room for more…
    no art is made without lots of dark rich blood flowing through it, and it needs quite a few tears of frustration and even anger & a lot of sweat and stripped back to the bare bones honesty to yourself… to get to the truth… cause that’s what this artist’s life is all about… finding your truth, no one else’s otherwise it’s not the real thing & it won’t speak true
    Saying all that though it also needs objectivity…
    a plan does help with making art, whilst doing the degree in Visual Arts the glass department was into autonomous learning but keeping an objective eye on the work by using a scientific way of looking at things-
    Aim
    Method
    Materials
    Conclusion
    when I was in second year the teachers said my work wasn’t objective enough & I simply could not get my head around that, art making is a subjective experience after all!
    A friend who was doing a doctorate in semantics helped me understand…
    She asked, “What are you making?”
    I said, “Glass dragons”
    she said, “Tell me what you know about dragons.”
    So I talked at length about the history of dragons in myths from all around the world & the various lizard dragons that live on earth now and in prehistoric times.
    Then she asked, “How does what you know about dragons relate to the dragons you are casting in glass?”
    & in that moment a lightbulb came on in my head, suddenly I was able to view my art objectively, taking the me as maker/dreamer out of the work and seeing how it relates in the context of other similar work in the world.
    Now I am such an outsider it doesn’t matter, I can only make the work and hope for the best & then make the next dream thing that needs to get done in the few short years I have left on this planet!

    Like

    Reply
  21. jude Avatar
    jude

    i don’t know. this artist thing. never have never will.

    Like

    Reply
  22. Laura R Avatar
    Laura R

    Thanks. Checking out the NPR link. Especially lovely of you to restructure clothing for your friend.
    xoxo

    Like

    Reply
  23. Deb G Avatar
    Deb G

    Just thinking…the word artist is a noun, a label, a job description, a lifestyle…I wonder if we limit ourselves with labels? Just thinking…

    Like

    Reply
  24. Minka Avatar
    Minka

    This conversation is rich and deep. Thank you all. Thank you Grace for opening the conversation.
    Only recently, have I accept the label of artist. I thought I left much of that behind 35+ years ago when I switched from textile design to public health nutrition. Looking back, I now see that the art has been here all along, perhaps as a neglected child but always here. I am taking a long look back and see that I always found ways to create art on the job. I am eager for the chances I hope my retirement will bring to put more art into the years I have left.
    As a single woman with no children, I see myself free of some of the struggles around “selfishness.” Years ago, a male artist friend told me that women artists had it much harder and for many success meant not having a family life. I’m not sure if that’s true but I wonder.
    For me, to not create eaves a hunger. It’s just something I do. I have to do.

    Like

    Reply
  25. Minka Avatar
    Minka

    Love this rich conversation. Posted a long response that somehow was not accepted by type pad. Maybe I’ll try tomorrow. Thanks to all.

    Like

    Reply
  26. yvette Avatar
    yvette

    sharing lifes lived is major art for me
    blaf my dog next to me couldn’t agree more…looking at me a quick look a little lick and snoring away again not waiting what she wait’s of..the long walk in a minute
    i mean ..well you know…..

    Like

    Reply
  27. grace Forrest Avatar
    grace Forrest

    maybe i am. maybe it’s the way that i Can explore that
    Care and Feeding…. the only way for me really, because
    it’s ongoing. that’s what i came to realize that there was no place to begin and no place to
    stop.
    it’s just ongoing…so how do you write that?, but just by
    going…thanks for seeing that….xo

    Like

    Reply
  28. grace Forrest Avatar
    grace Forrest

    well…i said what i did not as comparison, me to them,
    less to more,
    but to look at those who DO do what i consider devoted
    Art. what do i see in them? it’s learning. not
    comparison.
    remember when i called Charla Khanna? asking her this
    exact same thing?…like that. SHE has devoted her whole
    life to her art. we had babies at the same time. she
    Devoted. i did not.
    and i somehow think it’s never too late…i have a taste
    for it…blood on my tongue…

    Like

    Reply
  29. grace Forrest Avatar
    grace Forrest

    again…it’s the doing. and only each of us can hold
    our doing and know it.
    as you say…”whatever your passion at the time”. that’s
    the crux to me

    Like

    Reply
  30. grace Forrest Avatar
    grace Forrest

    am glad for these thoughts. i’ve begun reading the book.
    so far, i cannot find myself…like i’d hoped, but rather
    small bits and pieces…we’ll see
    but thank you for these foundations to thinking,
    love,

    Like

    Reply
  31. grace Forrest Avatar
    grace Forrest

    i am happy just being. i am NOT comparing myself.
    i AM ACKNOWLEDGING THAT THERE IS A DIFFERENCE WITH THESE
    WOMEN BECAUSE OVER TIME
    AND MAYBE THAT’S WHAT INTERESTS ME, OVER TIME OVER A LONG
    TIME
    they have done their art. i was distractable. and to use
    nance’s word, maybe that life of distractability has
    CONDITIONED ME in the same way that their focused life has
    contitioned them????and yes…i have lived a kind of a
    Movie, really. but what i am sitting with now is this
    love of MAKING that was always there but never given
    PRIMARY POSITION.
    this is what is INTERESTING
    INTERESTING
    to me.
    that’s all….

    Like

    Reply
  32. grace Forrest Avatar
    grace Forrest

    that still does not speak to this question of
    devotion

    Like

    Reply
  33. grace Forrest Avatar
    grace Forrest

    Saskia…yes. YOU. What on earth would you
    create if not balancing your family with your Art?????
    my point is not to question that tho….but to encourage
    anyone who is younger than i
    to hold their art as strongly as all the rest if they
    LOVE it and to wait patiently until (and for you it will
    be soon) they no longer need the focused devotion and
    BE READY. I think always of Susan C, too. it’s something
    that needs encouragement, support, spurring on. when
    you are alone with it in your head and hand, it can seem
    “less than”. It’s Not.

    Like

    Reply
  34. grace Forrest Avatar
    grace Forrest

    yes. there is ignition. Fire.

    Like

    Reply
  35. grace Forrest Avatar
    grace Forrest

    Julie, yes. women, generally, and no judgement either
    way, but women are women. women also haven’t as yet been
    prone to make war.
    so…this is why i want to look at it. i want to understand.
    it’s a time in my life when i want to understand some about
    it.

    Like

    Reply
  36. grace Forrest Avatar
    grace Forrest

    linda…it’s really convoluted to me. really.
    and i think some of it is because i am 67 yrs. finding
    self asking self some of the same same same questions.
    time of reconciliation in some way…i don’t know.

    Like

    Reply
  37. grace Forrest Avatar
    grace Forrest

    kat, YES. so totally yes and absolutely to all that
    you say.
    but i am zeroing in to what i MAKE. the Cloth, specifically. and not how it is seen or accepted by anyone else, but
    the response in the form of Devoted Energy i give. to
    say….aside from the care and well being of the animal
    people, the plant people, this is EQUAL. all else can
    now receive what is left.
    CAN I SAY THAT??????

    Like

    Reply
  38. grace Forrest Avatar
    grace Forrest

    your words stopped me dead in my tracks

    Like

    Reply
  39. grace Forrest Avatar
    grace Forrest

    Dee…a question for you.
    Could you, can you see yourself saying:
    I am going to sequester myself in my studio for a year.
    i am going to simply Be there. if there is a 911, let
    me know. if not, i’ll be back.
    to your husband, your sons, your sister, your whatever
    other ties?
    could you imagine yourself saying that?
    this is the Thing. i go to do my thing with Alz B because
    it eases the heart of her son. i COULD find adequate
    care for the Old Cowboy if i really tried. but do I?
    no. Why? this is what i am asking my self. why don’t
    you, grace…..it’s not for lack of love…or IS IT?

    Like

    Reply
  40. grace Forrest Avatar
    grace Forrest

    i know

    Like

    Reply
  41. grace Forrest Avatar
    grace Forrest

    i just LOVE knowing you

    Like

    Reply
  42. grace Forrest Avatar
    grace Forrest

    it’s not the artist thing.
    it’s cloth and me. me and cloth.
    artist has nothing at all to do with it.
    making cloth stories IS art. that’s just a given.
    oh jeez…i am like you. trying to find some fucking
    way to say what i mean

    Like

    Reply
  43. grace Forrest Avatar
    grace Forrest

    laura…yes. maybe it will
    help
    i am a helper

    Like

    Reply
  44. grace Forrest Avatar
    grace Forrest

    throw the word artist into the trash bag.
    i am trying to find my place in TAKING SPACE TO
    MAKE THINGS.
    i WANT TO MAKE THINGS. I WANT TO MAKE LOTS OF THINGS.
    I WANT TO LEARN MORE AND MORE ABOUT MAKING THINGS.
    this
    i have not given priority to Ever. yet.

    Like

    Reply
  45. grace Forrest Avatar
    grace Forrest

    i wish you would keep trying

    Like

    Reply
  46. grace Forrest Avatar
    grace Forrest

    yvette…yes. i know and i know that YOU know….
    i like your hand

    Like

    Reply
  47. grace Forrest Avatar
    grace Forrest

    yvette…no…
    i LICK your hand
    (like it too, but that wasn’t what i wanted to say)

    Like

    Reply
  48. Dee Avatar
    Dee

    aGAin with the edge. triggering acid in my stomach. feeling singled out.
    NO, I could not abandon my kids to the studio. Absolutely not. So, as Messud says, that is a negotiation that continues, with greater or lesser success, day by day.
    My sister is another story. I’m working on that.
    I can imagine being more focused, more productive, better at guarding my time. But not by walking away.
    Part of what is hard is I want to WRITE and QUILT. Part of what else is hard is finishing things. I am fairly productive, but it doesn’t show as much as it might if I finished everything that I work on (and quite NEARLy finish).

    Like

    Reply
  49. grace Forrest Avatar
    grace Forrest

    dee
    sorry. again, the edge.
    i’ll just go there by my self.
    i’m sorry.

    Like

    Reply
  50. Dee Avatar
    Dee

    it’s not that there is an edge… gawd knows I flash and cut with one on a regular basis and am approaching an age where I no longer feel the need to apologize for it
    it’s the confrontational tone to ME in the midst of positive, flowing, near-gushing at times, responses to others.
    I can’t help but wonder, what is it about ME that is bringing this out?
    if you want to continue on email, feel free. but mostly, I want to walk away.
    (how about to the studio, she asked?) No, it’s Sunday. I will do the puzzle. Drink coffee. Pick up the house. Do laundry. Get the kids to mow the lawn. Do my daily pages. Finish ‘The Dancer’ by Colum McCann (I read constantly – there’s another time-taker). Make a couple of meals.

    Like

    Reply
  51. grace Forrest Avatar
    grace Forrest

    o yikes. i give.
    love, g

    Like

    Reply
  52. Dee Avatar
    Dee

    sorry to push back so much and thank you for hanging in there.
    i give love.
    Dee

    Like

    Reply
  53. grace Forrest Avatar
    grace Forrest

    that’s how the Goats do it, a little good natured
    pushing.
    maybe it’s my Sagittarian ness too?
    love, Dee, love to you

    Like

    Reply

Leave a reply to Mo Crow Cancel reply