windthread

as it goes when there's a lot of stuff going on, i wake at about 2:30 am and am awake for over an hour, till i fall asleep again. That hour, MIND just has it's way with me. Going from one thing to the next sometimes back and then around.           All  just not necessary and really, wasted.  Kind of interesting, but not necessary and really, wasted.  But it Happens and so,  i am the receptor.  Last night it was associated to the dream in which there was suddenly a Garuda,  you can google,  and Tay lunged and worked to "save" me but suddenly was on her back and "laughing"…how does a dog laugh?  i can't tell it in words,  but she was.  She was laughing.  And i got tired of all this in the middle of the night so i got up and went out, naked,   to the truck that is still inside the fence from unloading feed and i got up on the hood and just leaned back on the windshield.  I watched the "Sky"…that darkness with myriad points of light we call stars.  And i thought about how it is that

i Love.

 

I love summer.  The heat,  the uncontrollability of what happens,  good and not so much,  but good and not so much for WHO?  Why am i still the center of this?  

I love this Place,  the Goats,  Tazmeena,  Tay and Chinche,  the birds,  the lizards,  insects, plants,  

I love it all.

I love that i am alive.

I love that i am alive and in Relationship with Everything.  I love that it's Love that is at the root of any sadness at imminent loss.  I love that.   and it makes it worth it…the struggle to understand.

I love that my meditation practice now is Driven by the realities that present from day to day.

I do not love the Old Cowboy,  but i DO love what he requires of me,  love that it is  teaching me things that are invaluable.  I love that the Cloth Making eases it all and is about Love

 

 

 

i love this stone,  that is so much a Goat's Eye and came from the Sea.  far away

 

and rests,  day unto day on the Altar here

I love all the things possible to Believe In  but somehow, not completely for me,  but some, all of them

 

When i went to clean at Allan's there was this and a note on a post it…Thought you might like to look at this….

well,  yes…takes me back many many years,  many many hopes,  many many Loves