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it was Work Away and when i got back i took a nap.  On the futon couch.  Woke and just sat there,  looking across the room.  Looking to the West Window on the right with Winter Bitch and the Best Cloth.  Looking back, across the room to the altar and then…to it's right or my left,  the squares of wood that had been lying flat under the tray with the tomato seedlings.  Still there….and i stood them up and just stared at them.  They seemed to depict how it is in my mind now,  where i can't find a Thought that seems to offer any kind of sense to what seems to be happening with  Humanity right now.  I became very interested in them because when the mind cannot make any kind of meaning,  it looks for anything that might give meaning.

 

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i wish i could believe there is a god,  i wish i could believe in God,  i wish.  but i don't.   and so i am left here,  in this day today unable to find a single Thought that eases any of this,  that sees hope of any Intervention,  human or divine that will steer us through these dark days.  We are on our own.  How do we Go?

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19 responses to “thoughts”

  1. Jeanne Avatar
    Jeanne

    I like the wood pieces, like them a lot. Especially cause they came under tomato plants. But yeah, no matter how you arrange them, nothing makes much sense. Except that yes, we are on our own.

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  2. Mo Crow Avatar
    Mo Crow

    love will find a way

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  3. Michelle in NYC Avatar
    Michelle in NYC

    Those blocks of wood ended up making a whole lot of sense.
    May I remind you that one madman does not constitute the whole of humanity, not even a hundred thousand madmen do. http://www.openculture.com/2016/06/bertrand-russell-the-problem-with-the-world-is-that-fools-fanatics-are-so-certain-of-themselves.html

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  4. jude Avatar
    jude

    windows.

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  5. Tina Avatar
    Tina

    I have no words….

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  6. margaret johnson Avatar
    margaret johnson

    Hello Grace, look through your wonderful wooden frames and take in the beauty and love and peace that is your Home. Feel it and treasure it. Every day we are reminded how complicated the Human Race is. But I am certain the vast majority of the Human Race, are good. Mad men, greedy men, ignorant men, violent men are abhorrent. It seems nothing will change them. There is no sense to it, no ryhme or reason. We must continue to see the good in people, of all colours and creeds. Our hearts go out to those beautiful young people of Orlando, who were struck down, while celebrating their lives. And of course their Families and Friends. Your Home and all the love and Beauty that resides there is soprecious, embrace it. Love from Margaret oxox

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  7. Marti Avatar
    Marti

    The other evening I watched a program on my local PBS channel. The program is Natural Heroes and Joanna Macy was the subject.
    http://naturalheroes.org/videos/joanna-macy-and-the-great-turning/
    Joanna is an eco philosopher and her words are a way of just going but I will admit, I have struggled with despair and just going over this election and have distanced myself in some ways from using words and now Orlando, so I reflect on Joanna’s words and hope that in time, I can use them to move through. Here is part of her conversation:
    “…by honoring our despair and not trying to suppress it or pave over it as some personal pathology, we open a gateway into our full vitality and to our connection with all of life” …She went onto say, “Beneath what I call our ‘pain for the world,’ which includes sorrow and outrage and dread, is the instinct for the preservation of life. When we are unafraid of the suffering of our world, and brave enough to sustain the gaze and speak out, there is a redemptive sanity at work.
    “The other side of that pain for our world is a love for our world. That love is bigger than you would ever guess from what our consumer society conditions us to want. It’s a love so raw, so ancient, so deep that if you get in touch with it, you can just ride it; you can just be there and it doesn’t matter. Then nothing can stop you. But to get to that, you have to stop being afraid of hurting. The price of reaching that is tears and outrage, because the tears and the power to keep on going, they come from the same source.”
    In a moment of synchronicity, today Terri Windling on her blog, Myth and Moor quoted the above passages.
    When words fail and the easier path is a distant one, others come forward to speak of just going for the whole and to remind us that we are not alone and because this is so, community and connection heal…

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  8. saskia Avatar
    saskia

    for me, by accepting we are who we are, I am who I am; I have love and hate within me, I choose love over hate most moments, when I am week however, I succumb to the hateful thoughts and feelings and must look hard at them: all of our actions stem from within

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  9. grace Avatar
    grace

    Thank you SO SO much for commenting here…it means a Lot to me
    and yes, On our own. Those words, their meaning

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  10. grace Avatar
    grace

    or love will simply love
    and maybe that’s enough for love to do

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  11. grace Avatar
    grace

    PLEASE…always remind me

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  12. grace Avatar
    grace

    yes. windows.

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  13. grace Avatar
    grace

    this is good. to have no words.

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  14. grace Avatar
    grace

    yes. the Vast Majority are good and feeling probably similar to
    me in these times…so we must stand in solidarity….in the
    plain goodness and love

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  15. grace Avatar
    grace

    to preserve Life in all it’s myriad ways…

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  16. grace Avatar
    grace

    it’s always about standing and Facing and then
    standing and facing again
    and again
    and again
    every thing is from within, this is true.

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  17. Deb G Avatar
    Deb G

    I look at the wood and see frames, frames that are portable and can show different views. I see scaffolding, something that can be built upon. And I look at them and know that they are perishable, they can be burnt, they can be torn apart and remade, but in that process they are becoming something else, something that can still be useful.

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  18. grace Avatar
    grace

    your words make me have the thought that
    Everything
    is useful in some way or another…Everything.

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  19. Linda Avatar
    Linda

    Hi Grace
    I also wonder and cannot sort out what is happening. I always think good will win out, but not sure anymore. It hurts me to know that my grandchildren are going to see such a changed world. I still come here and read and am silent. I am still here..
    love to you

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