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for the Company who is my brother.  it occurred to me that this is most likely the last time we will see each other in this lifetime.  Neither of us are much for travel.  It's been over 10 years since i went to Minnesota…i am not good at remembering time.  And he came here once,  maybe 15 years ago?  more?  Anyway…….not doing a Lot ,  but just some.  He will have little interest in my dust and cob webs.  We are the same, like that.  

And as i go about,  doing the "some",  enough to let that higher vibration loose,  i've been thinking about what "came through" during those nightime hours last night when i woke.  Have been using that time for Tonglen.  You can google. Wikipedia.   Giving and Taking.  It works to find some quiet within the great sorrow for the suffering of so many on this planet today,  for those needing to escape but seeing no where to go.  for this prevailing toxicity to this country's open heartedness.  Tonglen.  I need this meditation.  

but also,  last night,  i did fall back asleep after a while, but then woke again to the thought of Empathy.  I remembered saying somewhere in one of the comments i think yesterday that there was some of being afraid.  Which there is.  it comes and goes.  so i was "told" to consider Empathy.  Not just holding an openness to what another might be experiencing,  but to take it Further.

"Empathy:  the capacity to understand or feel what another person is experiencing from within the other being's frame of reference."  wikipedia

the Further,  that i was able to see was not just their "frame of reference",  but to actually "go INSIDE them".  For instance,  go INSIDE Alyssia's body with the 5 inch being swimming around and the 7 year old son and the 9 year old foster daughter,  being 28 years old.  

Not to just look at her,  see her as if i am standing in front of her,  looking into her face.  And not to try to sense myself behind her,  looking out,  as she might look.

But to see if i can go INSIDE her being,  her experience….actually look out through her eyes.  Be One with her,  imagine her feelings,  her impressions.  

Am i explaining this in some kind of intelligible way?  

it's just a Shift,  but an important one.  

 

 

 

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16 responses to “housekeeping”

  1. Tina Avatar
    Tina

    Yes you are explaining it just fine … warm and thought provoking feelings that are coming from deep inside yourself.

    Like

  2. grace Avatar

    i just hung up from talking with her, telling her what i wrote here, and yes…there is a subtle difference that is a
    DIFFERENCE.
    while i talked i watched a wolf spider skittering around…went to the cabinet and got a glass to trap it, catch it. Most likely
    came from the OLD wood i am bringing in to burn now, the new
    this winters wood having run out. So i brought it in. and Sentient.
    Sentient Being, what was described to me in buddhist terms as being one who runs from pain…suffering…
    so this Spider runs….i have chased it, phone to ear, but chasing and it outruns me…running from what it perceives to be dangerous, which i won’t be, just catch it and fling it OutSide again, but it is perceiving danger and running

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  3. Michelle in NYC Avatar

    I need Tonglen too–this from Pema Chodron:
    https://youtu.be/QwqlurCvXuM
    gotta sign out computer is tripping me up

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  4. grace Avatar

    it is Freeing, Tonglen, freeing in its own
    amazing way.
    We are One.

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  5. Michelle in NYC Avatar

    Okay…I’m back. Thinking about empathy in relationship to fear. I think empathy for ones self is the first step. My fear thing comes and goes too and I have to remind myself to care, not run and hide, or struggle against…just care, like do something comforting for myself (“there there, it’s okay”). Simplistic I’m sure, but it’s what I’ve got. Your going inside another is complex and I’m glad it’s working for you…”slight shift”. I’ve been unwell for days and finally going to the gastroenterologist tomorrow. I’m more vulnerable (not in a good way as in ‘open hearted’) when I’m unwell. Tonglen for myself tonight.

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  6. grace Avatar

    your Honesty in these words is critical to the understanding of it.
    Is very fine.
    our vulnerability is the Teacher. otherwise, it’s just words.
    the vulnerability lets it be REAL.
    Love and Love to you,

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  7. ali Avatar
    ali

    When my first child was born, and looking at him I had the feeling of not being separated, of breathing the breath he took, and how he was experiencing the world. That used to happen to me sometimes after with complete strangers, on a bus maybe. A lot to think about – imagine doing that with er, a very well known person. Frightening, but perhaps frightening in the way Tonglen can be – pushing at the boundaries between ourselves and others.
    My aquaintance with Tonglen has been passing, but I found the Pema Chodron video so clear and helpful. Thank you Michelle.
    Blessings for your visit with your brother Grace

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  8. jude Avatar

    I have been trying to do this so much lately, with all that is going on with so many.

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  9. patricia spangler Avatar

    Yes. But how to do this–this merging in empathy–without becoming incapacitated with the other’s pain?

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  10. Mo Crow Avatar

    making an opening for listening

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  11. grace Avatar

    Tonglen stretches us. Yes…love Michelle for posting that
    link.

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  12. grace Avatar

    yes, and the Expansion frees us to live our Best

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  13. grace Avatar

    we breathe OUT.
    we take it in anyway…the toxic…the fear….and it comes
    to block us. But when we breathe in and breathe out we
    free ourSelves to hang in there with whatever circumstance
    we must.
    i like it too so much about not so much suffering, but just the Experience that each of us carries….to know that we all are
    Carrying and we all are Going. I love it for this. to feel things as Not About Me, but about Us All. This is such a Gift.

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  14. grace Avatar

    Taking In.

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  15. dee Avatar

    yes clarity here. beautiful thoughts about empathy. I thought you were going to suggest empathy with white nationalists or something. A whole different order of exercise. Lately, practitioner tonglen, I find it hard to get to the positive in time for the exhale. My positive image/feeling seems so weak compared to the darkness I’m breathing in. But there is relief in breathing it all in, instead of resisting.

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  16. Kristin Avatar
    Kristin

    Much appreciation for the introduction to Tonglen…and Michelle, thank you for the link…truly a wonderful new piece to place in my life’s practice…wonderful.
    May your visitors have time to breathe in the beauty you have created in your home and yard…it will be a very good thing to have this visit with one with whom you have a history and long periods of absence of shared time.
    Love reading your blog..

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