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the pic from yesterday is of the second generation Basil down in the Wall Garden.   How FIERCE it grew, from its own seed,  producing seed this time that could serve the world.  It's everywhere.  It continues to produce its purple blooms at the end of the flowering stalks.  Not many,  but some maybe enough for the bees that arrive every morning.  But just SO many seeds.

and here in this pic above is the spigot for B Garden.  It's outside the fence,  next to the Road Up.    It has a very slight leak.  I turn it on then undo the fence and go through into B.  Give what water i need to and then let the hose run a while on the base of the Scrub Oak there,  the Pine.  There is nothing noticeable as in a response from them.  They just Be there.  No different than all the ones that get zero water.  

In the last week or so….there,  where the leak is,  the two small plants have grown.  GREEN.  one a plant and one a grass.  This is also happening  at the bases of the Goats water bowls and near the fence where the hose hangs into Talkie's Palace yard.  Green.

All summer the water from the watering has been present.  All summer NOTHING grew.  Nothing.  But now…it begins.  I watch and am filled with Wonder.   The brilliance of it all,  the Sensibility of the unseeable seeds,  so so small,  that  Wait.    How does it go,  the Waiting?  Until it stirs?….is it the Light?,  the change in temperature?  the shortened hours dawn till dusk,  the change in the thickness of Sun Light?  What else?,  some deep humming vibration in the rocks and soil?  Some kind of SONG?  And in readying B Garden to day there were mushrooms.  So spores too.  All summer,  NOT.  Now,  Yes.   

To not squander.  To stand and hold until timing is right that will sustain Life.

I watch Talkie every evening now,  make her way up the long bough of the Oak.  She speaks the same exact words every night.  I hadn't planned to love her at all.  Didn't want to.  There's too much to love already.    But i watch as she enacts her mandate as a Being of this Earth,  so loyal to her chicken ness.  And i can barely stand the Love that that causes.

And it's said to stop watching the news.  But i don't.  I check in through the day.  All Fires have now become  "my" fire.   All places are my Place.

I began hearing the sirens differently today…before with a sense of dread…but today,  with the sense of those who are Responding. Their crazy courage that allows them to go INTO the Fire.    What On Earth Is THAT?   and i am filled with Love for them.

so it's all just turning in to Love of a kind.   A very very hard love and really,  i am so glad to be able to come to know this kind of love

 

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20 responses to “loving so hard”

  1. Acey Avatar

    Your consideration of seeds is wonderful and so are the pictures. So much else is here as well. The shift of inner response when hearing sirens. Your ongoing fine tuning of love/relationship – what it means and what it contains.

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  2. Michelle Slater Avatar

    Whenever I’ve presented the Sensei at my Zen center with a problem I’m struggling with, he said: That’s your Dharma then.” My path. Yours has led you to deep loving. I am loving your lovingness dear Grace.

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  3. Michelle Slater Avatar

    I posted but it disappeared. I said-When I presented a problem I was struggling with to the Sensei at my Zendo…he said “So, that’s your Dharma (path)” and your dharma has led you to deepening and expanding love. I am just loving your lovingness dear Grace.

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  4. Liz A Avatar

    we learned a lot about “seed banks” when we took Master Naturalist classes after moving to Texas (a wonderful way to learn about new environs) … what especially stuck with me was not only how seeds bide their time, waiting for the best conditions in which to grow, but also how not all seeds do so, even in ideal conditions. Because ideal can turn less so, if abundant rains cease. And so, some seeds remain, waiting for the next ideal time … or the one after that. It is a deep wisdom that is beyond our ken …

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  5. Mo Crow Avatar

    here in Australia summer is the time when most plants slow down and just hold fast to handle the hot days

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  6. yvette Avatar

    Reading that you didn’t want to love talkie because there is so much to love made me griining..
    Love is Grace
    Grace is love
    At the end of the post I was in tears …Grace you are loved

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  7. Beth Avatar

    (((Grace))) You were meant to be an elder in these times. You fill me in the same way Joanna Macy does. Thank you for seeing, loving, and writing about it All.

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  8. dee Avatar

    Just a beautiful post.

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  9. Michelle Slater Avatar

    Posted comment twice yesterday but it disappeared?

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  10. grace Forrest Avatar

    testing….Michelle and Patty unable to leave comment…will
    this go through?

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  11. Marilyn Avatar

    Hello from Typepad!

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  12. grace Forrest Avatar

    HEY!, Marilyn from Typepad! Ok, then….
    i will get back to them. I guess this means
    all is well on Typepad end.
    THANK YOU!!!!!
    Love,
    grace

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  13. Zlatan Ft. Burna Boy – Gbeku mp3 Download Avatar

    This is just too awesome. I think i need this in my Garden

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  14. grace Forrest Avatar

    it is. I am being tuned. it comes from OutSide

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  15. grace Forrest Avatar

    i am feeling the understanding of that…the deep wisdom.
    I am in awe.

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  16. grace Forrest Avatar

    yes. this is here too. I am so looking forward to watching again, THIS time, the shift…i am more ready for it this time

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  17. grace Forrest Avatar

    i just wanted to take care of her. But…here we are.
    Love. And she loves back

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  18. grace Forrest Avatar

    that is a Big thing to say and i wish it was near true…
    Joanna Macy…but i am telling what i can as best as
    i can and that’s the best i can do. I love you and
    hope it goes well with you

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  19. grace Forrest Avatar

    Hello? are you for real?

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