this photograph   Noah Berger  associated press   in NYT my body.  my self.   can barely hold this photograph.  Firefighters….they are singular extraordinary human beings.   who become crazy with it.  it consumes them.   when there is threat here,  they gather forces at the Lakeside Grocery just down the way,  there's a large parking lot full of their…

i read late last night and began early this morning.   Done.  Parable of the Talents.     how Alyssia had wanted me to read the two for so many years and i said i couldn't.  But suddenly,  i could and Did.   ok.    For me,  the time is right.   i'm glad i didn't before.  i'm glad…

is White,  not blue.   this vehicle,  now called Friend.     a bin,  up from campsite B   space.  under the back seat which will be the bed.  Good thing there's not much of me.   the roofbag has been delivered to Alyssia's.   will have it in the next day or so.    With that middle…

  it's All Maybe.   Maybe we will need to evacuate.  Maybe not.     Maybe if there IS fire,  the Hill will burn.  Maybe not.   In "recorded history"  here,  there has been no fire,  or,  no catastrophic  fire.  Maybe there never will be.   But,  one way or another,  we will all still live.   The Goats will…

  all the Hard.    i wake  this morning  and say…to self,   it only takes a little,  just a little and it WILL brighten all the hard of 100 temps,  Fires nearby,  unrelenting News,   Alyssia's OLD  rat terrier dog Zoey with Fireworks Syndrome,   escaping the fence and RUNNING in Terror,  gone.  15 hours etc.  etc. …

cover art….Parable of the Talents   what i was going to take last Evening.  incl the comforter from the Animal shelter garage sale in Socorro,  underneath.   the Tina Quilt,  my pillow.   Just this much.  i had no will.    

this from the other day.   Just now dark….4th July.    since around 5,  everyone came again.  Replay of the Fire Alert of last Thursday but in another direction…again 6 miles away,  but they come,  in case.   Worked on Goat Boat wiring that the "boys",  the two young wethers,   had chewed AGAIN….those New wires…..gotta come up…

this is not what i'd thought …but i just finished a conversation with Alyssia that i value beyond value and can't put here because it is too raw and convoluted and complex….but rising out of the LAW of white men…..to speak of women's bodies….but so much more and it surprisingly circled to my father saying…

so much could be written here this night.   Too much.   My head…Heart….are overflowing.   and the rush of it all continues.   So,  i finally said to self this evening…ok….What ….can i DO  to relieve the pressure?   i already knew…just small ordinary things…sort through the red tool box…take out  what is not loved,  the duplicates…make room for…

i'd loaded this pic early this morning,    6 something because again,  Internet is ify.   I'd imagined some things i might say.  It's Jenny's favorite vine that climbs from the base of the Scrub Oak at B.    and here…..here….we see…..2 blossoms this year.   and it is/was  Trust Time at 7oclock.   so i sat…