windthread

have never seen something like this before.   don't even know how to look it up.    Right there,  next to the driveway,  maybe 10ft up the trunk.   Direct sunlight when there IS some…..    and today there was.   Glorious,  pure,  strong  SUN.   All day.  

i remember who i was.

this evening,  a bevy of Quail in the Doe Forest.    at least a dozen.   A moth fluttering,  lighting,  fluttering at the roof rim of the Curry House.   We talked about the Someday new  herd members.   That was very.    very.   good.    Most likely we will get 2 bred does.   Let them begin their contingent from that….probably at least 4 kids  born here.   We looked at the milkstand from N Mex.   The kids will learn.   Goat kids.   Human kids.   Learn.

it's letting up.     Today is the third day of no rain.   There will be some more,  but  no longer         rain Season.     There's a long list.  We walked the fence lines and they cleared two fallen  trees with the chain saws and re attached the fencing.   I wandered and looked at    the   multitude of Beauty FULL   lines and shapes the  branches form …how amazing it would be to draw this image,  line after line,   how so FULL the reality of the LIFE  both past and present would  flow through the marks  of the pencil.

i think about this.   I could.    I could make a print of this pic and actually do that.   What would i LEARN?  How more fully would i   "know"   this Doe Forest?   Minnow ran and flew through ,  over trees,  and a couple times over fences.   I think how her life has changed.  

and then….the planning,   the thinking…..this next week the rental  heavy equipment will be delivered,   the rockgravel.   Road up,  which has washed out in places be graded and the stones spread.   More thought tomorrow and maybe it's when the Geogrid gets put to use.   Jenny had bought it the first year and it's waited.   I think it's time is now.   There are many things on that list but before any of them,   the road up.      and down.    and back up.    Right now,  you can only drive half way.   and then need to BACK down.   This is what Alyssia has been doing with my ice/groceries/batteries etc.   AND  the bales of feed and 100 lb bags of pellets. …drives half way then pulls them the rest of the way on the "sled".    So.  here we go.    Our lives.

a Spring Peeper Song  X   many     M A N Y

The Gathering at the Well.         Some housekeeping.      Some of Us who had wanted to participate     for whatever   reasons,  have not been able to.         It's been 6 months now.      Wendy suggested that we send out the invitation again in case anyone is now interested.    We meet twice a month on Saturdays.    Each of us bring our own Work.    It's a Therapy Group,   as different from a Support Group.   Therapy Group.   We Work.    If you are interested,  you can contact me or Wendy by Email….

wendygolden@rogers.com   .     We are magnificant.   We go deeply into who we are becoming.   We surprise ourSelves.     We are Love as a verb.   

and then,  today,   Beth    of Still Life Pond     sent me this:   Sharon Salzberg's   Real Happiness Meditation Challenge 2024   Feb l  ~  28th.   just Google.   I'm signed on.   Hope maybe you will too.

Love to You this beauty FULL    SECOND DAY of NO RAIN   Love and Love 

ask the Plant…..Can you hold me?

wadded up in the door basket.

back.   Neckline and shoulders ripped down….just came apart  during a washing machine moment last summer.  And so,  here we go.   Why?   no idea.    

there used to be 3  hot day dresses.   the other 2 were very light weight denim.   I don't know what happened to them…that was back in New Mex when it didn't matter so much.   this one,  worn to smithereens in the last few California years.   Summer WILL come.   This will be as close to naked as i can get.   And so.    

this has something to do with a VERY short moment….and even not even a 

moment

this morning when i woke from a Little Sleep.   A split second almost when i understood something about a Lifetime….having to do with lifetimes of trees,  lifetimes of Land,  Forests,  community of trees  and then….people.   Also to do with reading Caste.  …the ongoingness of human beings Becoming societies.   It was very Beauty Full,  the understanding even tho it was over in such a flash that i cannot make contact with it now.   But there is a feeling that it will come again,   Show its Self.   Little by Little. And explain to me  About how i have Quit so much….let go of things i've always done,   feeling adrift from all known   but that is just very much ok and as i can be,  even should be…….that it all can be New.   as i get old.

caught it!     a pic    mid day!   and look what it is….a failed Chana masala.    so…..ok.     

it took this long.     This one single pic.    I started sometime around 6 pm   and then,  off and on,   till just now.    and i thought,  ok,  just once more….and then…..ta da….here it is.  and i don't even know what it was i was wanting to say………………    ………………………  something about that it's almost February …..the RELIEF from January,   February and Now WHAT?   

I've been watching CatherinE over on gemtactics  ,  her Sketch Journal,  admiring it so much and then thinking how i am doing Nothing and i got the Spirals from under things,  unrolled them and spread them out,  how they are so just pinned haphazardly,  i didn't even pin them well……     What.       So things tonight are nothing but Questions.   Just questions.   all falling under the category of

Now What?

all of them.   They didn't know what to do.   The bough was estimated at about 30  40   feet long,  maybe 1000 lbs.   Resting on a single point at the top of the windshield of the car.   and there were MANY branches.    all Live.      So,  they just began,  the branches first and as they cut them off the Goats gathered  and they continued and at some point ,   standing on the 10 ft ladder,  then on the roof of the car,   Jenny began cutting the bough in sections and rolling them off the roof and then,  the final cut when the heavy section FELL

the car was freed,   and no damage to the windshield,  hood,   even the rearview mirror,  no damage to the people

and so we go.   and after it was all done,  Jenny played hide and seek with Brinley and Emrie,  Minnow.

Sprawling,   reaching reaching OUT,  heavy   and sometimes……………breaking.    Went quickly to look,  so not sure but at immediate glance,  no great damage,   but     How do we do this?    relieve the weight and remove the branches?    and continuous rain for the next several days      The word these days is

Joy

people are finding Joy all over the place.       For me….there is always some kind of Basic Goodness as Chogyam Trungpa taught….always.   Basic Goodness.    but then,  or,   And then,   i have to just sit with things As Is.      The branch became too heavy,   It broke and fell.   Car was there.    Now What?

here and there,  all over,   there are little communities like this….differing one to another       I see these over by where i turn the hoses off and on….no where else.   Standing above,   they appear to be little stars,  tiny stars,  thousands of tiny stars and i squat down and see them to be tiny plants  .    All you can do is      wonder.   Be amazed by their exuberance  in January temperatures and rain sodden earth.   And in the last couple days,   the chanting of the Spring Peepers  (Beth) down by the canal/creek.   And late  in the day there was a flash of white just outside my vision…and i "saw" Arctica….and had to go Over where it was….it seemed so much to have been her      And,   while watching the MLK utubes,   up comes   Malcolm X.    So i watch these now.  I think about     "race".     Alyssia and I talked long last night about how it is to be "brown".   We have a lot more to think about.

there's a movie out….ORIGIN   based on Isabel  Wilkerson's book   CASTE.   which i got some months ago and never read.  Time now.  And tomorrow morning is the Gathering at the Well….am i am wondering what i will bring????….there's just so much.